Jennifer Lopez recently opened up about parenthood, privacy and giving her kids all the opportunities she didn't have while keeping them grounded.
In an interview with Vogue Magazine published on Nov. 8, Lopez spoke candidly about how important privacy is to her —something that has been elusive, especially after she reconnected with former fiancé Ben Affleck and the pair married on July 16.
"The other day, one of my kids said, 'I want to go to the flea market,'" Lopez told Vogue’s Rob Haskell. "I was like, 'Oh, you want me and Ben to come?' They said, 'You know, it's such a thing when you go, Mom.' It hurt my feelings."
Lopez went on to say that she understood where her child was coming from.
"I get it. They want time with their friends when they aren't being watched and followed and photographed," she added. "It's a thing. Nobody's complaining, but it's a thing."
In addition to sharing how fame impacts her family, Lopez — who shared that she plans to legally change her last name to Affleck — also opened up about the confidence her "newly blended family" has when it comes to sharing what is on their mind, both socially and politically.
“This generation is beautifully aware and involved and brave, and they will call bullsh*t on stuff really quick," she told the magazine. "I want my kids to stand up for themselves and the things they care about. I want all the little girls in the world to get loud. Get loud! Say it when it’s wrong. Don’t be afraid. I was afraid for a long time: afraid to not get the job, to piss people off, afraid that people wouldn’t like me. No.”
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Lopez has 14-year-old twins from her previous marriage with singer Marc Anthony, and Affleck has three children from his previous marriage to actress Jennifer Garner.
Lopez praised Garner as "an amazing co-parent" and said she and Affleck "work really well together." Unlike Garner, Lopez's co-parent, Anthony, lives on the opposite side of the country, so she says the transition into a blended family "is a process that needs to be handled with so much care."
"But it’s going really well so far," she added. "What I hope to cultivate with our family is that his kids have a new ally in me and my kids have a new ally in him, someone who really loves and cares about them but can have a different perspective and help me see things that I can’t see with my kids because I’m so emotionally tied up.”
Lopez also touched on the privilege her children have — privilege she was not afforded when growing up in a working-class Puerto Rican home in the Bronx. She said she hopes that "modeling hard work" will help to keep her children "grounded."
“I wanted to give them a life that I didn’t have, but they don’t get to have the experience of something that is also helpful, which is developing that survivalist mentality," she explained. “I really wanted to find a better way than having to put the fear in them. It’s like, I can hold a boundary with you but also be your ally."
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Lopez said that while as a parent she planned to teach her children a slew of lessons, she has realized — now that her twins have started high school — that "at the end of the day they wind up teaching you so much."
"(They remind) you of the things you need to know about life and how to love somebody and how to care for people," she added, "that in your 20s and 30s, as you're doing your own thing, you can lose sight of."
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