TODAY

TODAY   |  June 11, 2013

What should you do when a guest gets too comfortable?

Anna Post, author and spokesperson for the Emily Post Institute, and Toure, author and MSNBC co-host, offer advice on summer etiquette, including how to deal with guests and privacy.

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This content comes from Closed Captioning that was broadcast along with this program.

>>> and good host coming up in the summertime because of course you want to invite people to have a nice time at your home.

>> right.

>> but there's a -- hold on a second. roll that tape.

>> oh my gosh. i'm sorry. i thought it was the baby's room. i'm really sorry.

>> i was in the pool. i was in the pool.

>> tell her about it. that's what we were setting it up for. still funny. what do you do when you're trying to be a good guest?

>> a spokesperson for the institute and author and cohost and noted summer guest etiquette expert.

>> my wife and my mother are going he's the summer guest etiquette --

>> work with me, work with me.

>> what do you do if somebody overstays their welcome. it's a classic syndrome. how do you tell the person it's time to go.

>> if you you can give them a days notice say we loved having you but we have a big day coming up, a big week and we need to talk about your plans and that's fine. i mean, at this point, they've overstayed it's okay for you to do it. just be nice about it.

>> i've heard that before.

>> what do you do when people sometimes mistake your home for a hotel and leave it a mess? are you expected to clean up? aren't you expected to clean up and be a good guest.

>> yeah, you have to respect their home, especially if you're going to their vacation home . you have to be part of it. you can't be like you work for me now. come on.

>> think about it. you want to be a good guest. you want to get asked back again. especially if it's a nice vacation home .

>> if they're your friends you should have enough respect for them.

>> he's the kind of guy that asks for turn down service when he stays at his friend's house.

>> we put a call out on twitter. he wanted etiquette questions.

>> that's the place to go. twitter.

>> exactly. how do you politely tell someone they're a guest and therefore do not have to clean? this is the other side of that. people are overzealous trying to help out.

>> so the guest wants to be polite and offer i like to say tonight you're a guest and tomorrow you'll be family. tomorrow i'll accept your help but tonight let me host you.

>> i think it gets gendered. if the wife is helping out my wife will jump to help her out. if the guy is doing the cooking or cleaning, i'll want to jump in and help him so that he doesn't feel alone.

>> never touch another guy's grill.

>> we'll stand by it and talk to him while he's doing it but we're not touching his grill.

>> it doesn't have to be the men with the men or women with the women. don't leave a guest on