This story discusses suicide. If you or someone you know is in crisis, call 988 to reach the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline. You can also call the network, previously known as the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline, at 988, text HOME to 741741 or visit SpeakingOfSuicide.com/resources for additional resources.
Former Miss USA Cheslie Kryst's memoir hit shelves April 23 with the help of her mother, April Simpkins, who finished the book after Kryst died by suicide two years ago.
"By The Time You Read This: The Space between Cheslie’s Smile and Mental Illness — Her Story in Her Own Words" is a combination of the original manuscript Kryst completed two months before she died, per Extra, and her mother's reflections.
Kryst wrote about passing two bar exams, winning Miss USA in 2019, working as a correspondent for Extra and her lowlights of "heartbreak, betrayal and persistent depression," publisher Simon & Schuster said in a release posted to its website.
Simpkins picks up the story from there, detailing how she experienced her daughter's death and its aftermath.
Simpkins told Extra on release day that she published the memoir because Kryst asked her to in her final message.
“There was nothing that was gonna stop me from making that happen,” Simpkins said.
“Today is a cause for celebration because this was Cheslie’s dream,” she added. “And to see it reach the finish line means everything to me. And I know she is dancing in heaven.”
Simpkins died January 2022 at age 30. Her death started a conversation about how depression may present and how it was possible for a publicly gregarious person to have an overwhelming private struggle.
When TODAY.com interviewed Simpkins in 2022, she said Kryst being a public figure made it more difficult for her to mourn in peace.
“One of the things that was very difficult for me to deal with was not just that Cheslie passed, but ... dealing with your grief while simultaneously having so many people who did not know her personally ... want to speak on (her)," she said.
“My job was not to convince other people of who she was, but to hold tight to who I know she was,” Simpkins added.
She also recalled some of Kryst's patterns that hindsight has made her see differently.
“There were times when Cheslie would talk about something and as she continued to talk about it, I knew that had triggered something in her,” she said. “When I look in hindsight, I see it more. It’s not that I ignored it. I did address it with her.”
Kryst had attempted suicide prior to her death, and after that, “I listened very differently,” Simpkins said. “She never had to say to me, ‘Mom, this is really an issue for me.’ ... I knew these cues that when she brought something up in a certain way, we needed to talk through that. ... She needed support, not a fixer.”
Simpkins has become a mental health advocate since Kryst's passing and serves as an ambassador for the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI). Net proceeds from book sales will go to the NAMI's Cheslie C. Kryst Foundation, the publisher said in the release.
