Maya Vander is opening up about the joy her rainbow baby, Emma, is bringing after she and husband David Miller suffered multiple pregnancy losses.
The “Selling Sunset” star, 41, told People that she wanted to try for another baby as soon as possible after the devastation of delivering a stillborn boy named Mason in December 2021.
“I knew that once I lost my son that I wanted to get pregnant as soon as I can. People think it’s crazy but again, it’s really easy to judge from the outside,” she said.
“When I lost my son Mason I was mentally prepared to have three kids, and it was very difficult for me to just let go of that,” she added. “I could have said, ‘I have a boy and a girl. They’re healthy and happy. Let me just move on and forget about it.’"
Vander and Miller share baby Emma, whose birth was announced in May, as well as an older daughter, Elle, 3, and a son, Aiden, 4.
The Netflix star, who lost her son Mason when she was 38 weeks pregnant, told People she knew not everyone would support her decision to try to get pregnant again so soon.
“I had a huge voice that — I think unless you experience something like that it’s very hard to explain because most people will say you’re lucky and just leave it, be okay with what you have," said Vander.
"But it’s very hard to move on after you lost the baby, so late in pregnancy. Something was really missing," she added.
In June 2022, just six months after losing Mason, Vander revealed that she suffered a miscarriage.
The TV personality decided to keep her pregnancy with Emma under wraps, only publicly revealing the news when she announced the little girl's arrival on Instagram.
"Welcome to the world Emma Reign! My rainbow baby! This was a long 9 months as I kept my pregnancy as quiet as possible from social media. I gave birth few days ago and words can not express my sense of relief and happiness!" she wrote at the time.
Though the loss of Mason created a "big hole" in her heart, Vander is now grateful for the joy Emma brings to her family. "I wanted three kids and now it’s completed, and I’m very thankful," she told People.
In December 2021, just a week after the loss of her son, Vander penned an essay about her heartbreak for TODAY.com.
"It’s such a strange time for me. Sometimes I’m OK, and then something will trigger me and I’ll break down," she wrote. "I still have to work. I can’t just vanish. I had planned to wrap things up at work and then take time off for the baby and the holidays. My clients still need me. But physically and mentally, I am not in a good place."
Vander said that she and Miller had been "trying to lift each other up."
"We’ll probably go to therapy to better understand the grieving process. Maybe that will help a little," she wrote. "Right now, I spend a lot of time reading all the messages I’ve gotten from women since I posted on social media about Mason."
Despite the devastation she felt, Vander said she was still optimistic about expanding her family.
"One thing that gives me hope is that many women in a similar situation have gone on to have more children," she wrote. "I was very much ready for a third child, and now there’s a void. But they give me hope."