TODAY   |  April 09, 2013

‘Scary Mommy’ says playdates are ‘awful’

Jill Smokler, who writes the “Scary Mommy” blog, is out with her second book taking a humorous approach to parenting. She debunks some of the myths people like to believe about motherhood, such as the idea that all moms have nurturing personalities.

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This content comes from Closed Captioning that was broadcast along with this program.

>>> if you're a mom, you know how difficult it can be.

>> everyone tells you, it will get better, but one woman says don't believe a word of it. jill is the creator of the popular blog called scary mommy. her new book called "motherhood comes naturally and other vicious lies."

>> you know what you're talking about, you're a mother of three.

>> yes.

>> what are the ages?

>> five, seven, and nine.

>> she --

>> i had to think about it.

>> don't ask me their birthdays.

>> this whole thing started off as a blog, which was fun. a place for you to put everything down on paper and it really took off.

>> to vent a little bit?

>> just an online baby book for my kids, i wanted them to have some sort of record of what we did during the day and little stories and it just evolved into this community of moms and parents.

>> because there was truth in it, right?

>> exactly, people don't always talk about that stuff.

>> and the popularity shows that a lot of women didn't feel like their voices were being heard and finally when one of the women like you comes up and says, what's one of the lies, moms stealing, what's the story?

>> moms stealing? i'm trying to think what that would be.

>> let's go to the next one. that's another lie, that motherhood comes naturally. i think there's this notion that the minute a baby is born you just have this outpouring of -- love and maternal instinct .

>> exactly.

>> all of the answers come naturally. and they don't and it's not always as easy and natural as you want it to be. i think the love part is easy. but you know, having the right answers and the solutions, it's not.

>> specifically what to do, say what to do if they have a fever, what to do if they fall on their head.

>> i'll know if one of my children is really hurt. i always make the wrong call.

>> did something happen, specific?

>> well like my daughter fell off of the bed last year. i thought, that's nothing, it will be fine in the morning. it wasn't, it was broken. i rushed my youngest to the e.r. for stomach pain and it was gas.

>> you don't know the difference between gas and a broken arm ?

>> clearly not.

>> another myth is that moms happily share.

>> yes. i will --

>> all the good stuff, not the bad.

>> i, my children know that they are not allowed to drink out of my glass or share my food. it is off-limits, even if they're parched and they come up and have a bottle of water --

>> why?

>> they return it and they have little floaties in it.

>> don't you lick the gum and get the gunk off their face.

>> yes, i do it to them, but i don't want them getting their stuff all over me. they can go to the kitchen and get a glass of water.

>> what if they can't walk yet?

>> then they're not drinking water most likely, they have a bottle that i'm not drinking out of. when they're at the age where they can walk, they can get themselves water.

>> i like this.

>> let's play a little word association game . we're going to say a word and you're going to tell us the first thing that comes tour mind. the first word is playdates.

>> awful.

>> really?

>> well, because then you know, play dates once you're at the age where you can drop your child off and go do errands, are beautiful. when they're at the age when you have to stick around and make small talk with the other mom and try to fill the time there are a million things i would rather be doing.

>> how about playing tag with your kids?

>> pretty bad. not a huge fan at hide and seek . i had a confession on my site's confessional. where the mom would play hide and seek with her kids, it was the only way she could steal the nap. she would always hide in her bed under the covers, that i'm a big fan of. but tag --

>> i want to know why you kept having children.

>> not smart birth control.

>> no.

>> your book is very funny. and you are, too, and you're adorable. happy mother's day.