TODAY's Hoda Kotb is opening up about what it means to be with a partner who lets you be your authentic self.
The morning of Oct. 17, Hoda and Jenna Bush Hager spent some time chatting about actor Millie Bobby Brown's latest interview with Glamour. In the story, Brown revealed that her fiancé, Jake Bongiovi, is OK with her being "loud."
"When I met Jake," she told the outlet, "I just felt I could be loud. He embraced that and encouraged that. And I fell in love with myself while being with him."
That quote spoke to Hoda and Jenna, who both self identified as loud in their conversation, and led to Hoda revealing a past partner's wrongs.
"I was in a long relationship where I felt like I made myself so small so that he felt seen and worthy," she said.
Hoda didn't say which ex she was referring to, though she did say this was "a long time ago."
She explained how, being in the public eye, people will sometimes say hi to her when she is out and about.
"Every time it happened, and it was an 'ouch' to me, because I was like, 'Oh, he's gonna feel ... he's gonna feel an ouch,'" she said, explaining that her natural response was to just stop doing those things that were going to make her partner feel bad.
She recalled things like coming home and wanting to share an exciting day at work and realizing she couldn't because it "doesn’t compare to what his day would have been."
"So you just say, 'Oh, how was work? It was fine,'" she said.
"Then all of a sudden your relationship, you just get smaller and smaller," she concluded. "It takes a minute before you go, 'That doesn't feel great.' You think because you're helping him that somehow you're doing a service but you're not. You're doing a disservice to yourself."
Jenna agreed, saying, "You're not even being your real spirit."
