You know the headline's right.
"American Idol" voters'll get it wrong. Just like "Dancing With the Stars'" voters (and judges) got it wrong. Just like Donald Trump got it wrong.
And thank the TV gods for that.
FLASHBACK: The moves that got the 'DWTS' winner the win
It used to be, Americans bonded by complaining about the weather. But these days? The weather's too scary, too hellacious, too deadly for trivial griping.
Enter reality show finales!
Today, a nation stands as one in its inability to agree on pretty much anything that's aired in the past week.
"Celebrity Apprentice's" crowning of good-guy John Rich?" Marlee Matlin was robbed."
"Survivor: Redemption Island's" crowning of good-guy Rob Mariano? Well, all right, yes, the nation was fairly united in cheering that development.
Note, fairly, not unanimously.
"I can't believe how intolerant they are of Phillip," went one dissenting tweet. "No room for the strange folk."
A Phillip defender?! Really?!
Really.
Given this reality, do you you think Hines Ward's 'DWTS' win will be greeted with anything but scattered sniping?
Ha!
And double-ha to anyone who thinks a Scotty McCreery win on "Idol" will be ratified by all. Or that a Lauren Alaina victory will bring about the same.
This is a land of strong people with strong convictions who will talk your ear off about how Clay Aiken was cheated. Or how Adam Lambert deserved more. Or how David Archuleta was the better David.
WATCH: You think Haley looks like she thinks 'Idol' voters got it right?
Believe this: Somewhere, someone is still cheesed off about Fantasia beating Diana DeGarmo.
This is America.
The only rightful reality-show winner is the one you voted for.
Oh, and David Cook, too. He totally was the better David.