Some believe that when you talk about "healthy relationships" - you need to talk about it in terms of libido. However, most people think libido means "sex drive" - but in fact, it really means a "zest for life" - having vitality and being alive. Dr. Robin Smith says couples must have the following in order to have a healthy relationship:
Connection Leads To Passion In The Bedroom
Most men and women want a great sex life but there isn't anything that leads up to it. If you don't have a connection outside of the bedroom: if you don't create excitement or have a sense of fulfillment outside of the bedroom -- there will be no connection, excitement or passion in the bedroom. This leads to frustration, depression and straying.
Be On Your Own
One of the things that could help a healthy relationship is doing things outside the partnership. A lot of times, if you have a good relationship, you and your partner do absolutely everything together. This is not about that! Have a hobby or recreation that's apart from your partner/spouse. Doing things alone or with your friends, gives you not only a sense of self, but a sense of energy. Being apart would actually enhance your relationship.
What You Put In, You Get Out
You want to be friends with your partner. Think about your everyday friendships. You nurture and take care of those friends and most of the time, you not only value and nurture those friendships -- but you put a lot into them. It's just as important to do that with your partner. What you put into your relationship -- you get out.
Couples need to have the "what if" chat before they begin to have troubles. You need to talk about what you're going to do and how you're going to handle the situation if the relationship begins to have problems. This chat should not take place when life/relationship is bliss.