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Gordon Ramsay's daughter Holly opens up about depression after being assaulted in college

The 21-year-old got candid about her mental health struggles.
Kent & Curwen - Presentation - LFWM January 2019
Gordon Ramsay's 21-year-old daughter Holly Ramsay just launched her own podcast. Darren Gerrish / WireImage
/ Source: TMRW

Holly Ramsay is doing her part to break the stigma surrounding discussions about mental health.

The 21-year-old is mostly known as the daughter of chef Gordon Ramsay, but she's trying to forge her own path by launching a new podcast called "21 & Over with Holly Ramsay."

In the first episode, Ramsay opens up about her mental health journey during a candid conversation with therapist Talitha (Tally) Fosh. She started by speaking honestly about how growing up in the public eye has affected the way she perceives herself and the way the public views her.

"I guess I've always portrayed a different image than what was actually going on and now I'm ready to speak more about my mental health journey and just show the real me rather than what I think people would like to see," Ramsay said.

The newly minted podcaster explained that around six months ago, she realized that she wasn't being authentic on her social media accounts and said she's been trying to be more realistic with what she posts.

"It's hard trying to find the balance of still sticking to what I think people want to see and posting what I want to post," she said.

Ramsay revealed that she began experiencing feelings of depression when she was 13 years old and said her mental health struggles have ebbed and flowed for a few years.

"I remember having prolonged feelings of being quite sad and feeling just generally quite empty, as if I was just going through day by day and not feeling much joy. But I was just a teenager so I thought that this was completely normal," she said. "The idea of depression was quite a taboo; no one really spoke about it at all."

The 21-year-old recalled feeling confused when her depression would suddenly disappear only to make an unexpected return, and said she often felt guilty for having these feelings in the first place.

"I was confused as to why I had these feelings. I'm very fortunate. I've got an amazing family, great siblings who I get on with and love and adore. My parents, my relationship with them is great. So I felt very guilty for feeling like this," she said.

Kent & Curwen - Presentation - LFWM January 2019
The 21-year-old with her father, celebrity chef Gordon Ramsay.Darren Gerrish / WireImage

Looking back on her childhood, Ramsay said that she's always struggled with anxiety but didn't always have a name for the intense nerves she was experiencing.

"I never knew that it was anxiety; I just thought I was shy compared to my siblings," she explained.

During the podcast, Ramsay revealed that she was sexually assaulted twice at the age of 18 and said those encounters led her to PTSD while she was studying fashion during her first year of college.

"I was going out a lot, I was missing class because I'd been out. I was going clubbing way too much. I wasn't enjoying myself and I was struggling a lot more but didn't notice because I would just think that it was just a hangover or just a lot of work," she said.

After her first year of college, Ramsay spent three months in a psychiatric hospital in England and was diagnosed with PTSD, anxiety and depression. Since then, she's been in therapy up to three times a week and said it's helped tremendously.

"I now have these diagnoses that I carry around with me. It's confusing and I'm trying to take control of my narrative and use that to make something good," she said.

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