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Image: THE COSBY SHOW, Bill Cosby, Keshia Knight Pulliam, (Season 3), 1984-1992. © Carsey-Werner Co. / Cour

Dads

Famous TV fathers

Cliff Huxtable, Red Forman, Mike Brady and others set their kids straight. Their kids didn't dare laugh, but we can.

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Image: THE BRADY BUNCH, (top): Robert Reed, (middle row, l to r): Barry Williams, Mike Lookinland, Christop

Mike Brady of 'The Brady Bunch'

ON USED CARS: "Them who don't look, sometimes get took."

Courtesy Everett Collection
Image: Jean Stapleton

Archie Bunker, 'All in the Family'

ON MARRIAGE: "The only thing that holds a marriage together is the husband being big enough to step back and see where the wife is wrong.”

Cbs Photo Archive / CBS
Image: LEAVE IT TO BEAVER, Jerry Mathers, Hugh Beaumont, 1957-1963, 1958 episode

Ward Cleaver, 'Leave It to Beaver'

ON CATS: "Cats are very smart, though, Beaver. It's just that when you call someone Bootsy-Wootsy, he's inclined to be a little difficult."

Courtesy Everett Collection
Image: ROSEANNE, John Goodman, Roseanne, Sara Gilbert, Season 1, Ep. 'Here's To Good Friends', aired Dec. 2

Dan Conner, 'Roseanne'

ON EATING HABITS: "Eating cardboard can ruin your life. You could end up in the street, living in a box. Then you'll eat the box, and you'll be homeless."

©Carsey-werner Co/courtesy Ever
Image: THAT '70S SHOW, (from left): Kurtwood Smith, Debra Jo Rupp, 1998-2006. © Carsey-Werner / Courtesy: E

Red Forman, 'That '70s Show'

ON JOBS: "Why don't you just go down to the Bureau of High-Paying Jobs? It's right next to the Pie in the Sky office."

©Carsey-werner Co/courtesy Ever
Image: THE COSBY SHOW, Bill Cosby, Keshia Knight Pulliam, (Season 3), 1984-1992. © Carsey-Werner Co. / Cour

Cliff Huxtable on 'The Cosby Show'

ON TRYING: "You're afraid to try because you're afraid your brain is going to explode and it's going to ooze out of your ears. Now I'm telling you, you are going to try as hard as you can. And you're going to do it because I said so. I am your father. I brought you into this world, and I'll take you out!"

©Carsey-werner Co/courtesy Ever
Image:

Homer Simpson, 'The Simpsons'

ON LIFE: "I want to share something with you -- the three sentences that will get you through life. Number one, 'Cover for me.' Number two, 'Oh, good idea, boss.' Number three, 'It was like that when I got here.'"

FOX BROADCASTING CO.
Image: EVERYBODY HATES CHRIS, Tyler James Williams, Terry Crews, 'Everybody Hates Keisha', (Season 1, ep. 1

Julius Rock, 'Everybody Hates Chris'

ON EDUCATION: "Tutors are expensive; y'all just gonna have to work harder. We can barely afford kids; we can't afford stupid kids."

3 Arts Entertainment / Courtesy
Image: MARRIED...WITH CHILDREN, Christina Applegate, Ed O'Neill, David Faustino, 'Looking For A Desk In All

Al Bundy, 'Married With Children'

ON PERSPECTIVE: "Remember when I said that when we didn't have much that we could always look at the poor people less fortunate then us and feel better? Well ... let's find a mirror. "

©Columbia Pictures/courtesy Eve
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