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A psychologist breaks down Marshall, Jackie and Josh's 'Love Is Blind' triangle

This entanglement has people talking. But what does an expert have to say?

Season Four of “Love Is Blind” has spawned multiple love triangles, but one has especially generated conversation: Marshall Glaze, Jackie Bonds and Josh Demas’ entanglement. 

Kelsey Wonderlin, a licensed therapist and dating coach, can't forget her degrees even as she watches reality TV. She analyzes the “Love Is Blind” relationships as they unfold — and sometimes finds them lacking on the compatibility front.

Speaking to, Wonderlin shares what she thinks happened in Marshall and Jackie’s relationship, and the red flags she saw from the start.

But first, here's how the love triangle was born

The dynamic began back in the pods, when Jackie, a 27-year-old dental hygienist, felt torn between Marshall, a 27-year-old marketing manager, and Josh, a 31-year-old project engineer.

Jackie said Marshall helped her get in touch with her sensitive side, but she said Josh was more her type.

Ultimately, Jackie got engaged to Marshall. Their relationship hit some bumps after their first face-to-face meeting. With constant arguments, Jackie and Marshall realized they may not be as compatible as they’d hoped when they got engaged. So, when Jackie saw Josh for the first time in person at a birthday party, she remembered their attraction.

Jackie and Marshall broke up, and she went on to rekindle her relationship with Josh. Their relationship may be ongoing, with fans spotting them together at a sporting event in Seattle. Jackie called their connection “soul-binding” in an interview with

Speaking to in a separate conversation, Marshall explained how he felt their breakup was sudden. 

“For the majority of our relationship, you know, for time we were great. It was absolutely amazing. We talked about everything. We joked we laughed. I shared stuff with her that I hadn’t shared with anyone before,” he said.

While other cast members also reconnected with other people on the pods (see: Bliss Poureetezadi and Zack Goytowski), Jackie's allegiance switch is inspiring a particular conversation.

Wonderlin saw 'red flags' in Marshall and Jackie's 'argument pattern'

“Love Is Blind” depicted a few of Jackie and Marshall’s disagreements unfolding.

Wonderlin says she took note of a particular dynamic, which she called a “big argument, big makeup pattern.” Essentially, this means that Jackie and Marshall spent time and energy arguing, making up and then doing it all over again. 

Their initial connection in the pods is proof that two people can be compatible, but unable to work through conflict, Wonderlin says.

During their arguments, Wonderlin says comments that constitute “red flags” were exchanged, like when Jackie told Marshall he wasn’t “man enough” for her.

“It was definitely not OK for Jackie to say Marshall needs to step up and take care of physical intimacy. It’s much healthier to work as a team for both partners to have a role in initiating that in a more respectful way,” she says. 

Wonderlin says heightened emotions in arguments often lead to people saying things they don’t mean. For example, Marshall called Jackie a “project” and said he was attracted to the idea of fixing her. He later walked back those comments.

“I was so glad to see at the end that Marshall apologized for calling Jackie a project. He said he didn’t mean it. That’s what happens when we’re emotional,” she says.

The former couple's arguments usually seemed to resolve due to one person’s intervention (in this case, Marshall's). Wonderlin says she sees this pattern happen in real life.

“The person who’s in Marshall’s role is the one who ends up receding into a healthy conflict resolution because he’s the one who has the skills and depth to do so,” she says.

Ultimately, she said they didn’t have a foundation of trust. “For a healthy relationship you need to believe your partner when they apologize for those things and believe they really want to be repaired,” she adds.

Wonderlin guesses why Jackie moved onto Josh so quickly

Jackie's pivot from Marshall to Josh could be as simple matter of compatibility. Wonderlin also wonders if the switch had to do with Jackie's tendency to "shut down," a pattern she noticed starting during the couple's time in Mexico.

“The way she handled the stress of returning to the real world and her inability to like let her partner in on that ... she really shut down and was really not able to lean on him,” Wonderlin says.

Wonderlin says Jackie also "pushed Marshall away" by not saying she was missing the wedding dress fitting.

Since Jackie couldn't think of Marshall as her "teammate," she moved on quickly, Wonderlin says.

To Wonderlin, this is a characteristic of a person with an avoidant attachment style, people who tend to be mistrustful of intimacy.

“The pattern tends to be, they say ‘Oh, this is not my person so maybe over here, this guy is,’” Wonderlin says.

“They kind of jump from relationship to relationship telling themselves, ‘Oh, it’s not me, it’s that person they’re not a good fit for me, they’re not the one.’ Then they kind of get distracted by the new and shiny object of the other person who they’ve never had any problems with, because they haven’t been with them,” she adds.

Based on her on-camera interviews, Wonderlin says Jackie seems self-aware of her pattern, calling her introspection a "step forward."

“She’s cold at times and I think it’s hard to watch. But when she’s grounded and not in the moment of her trigger she seems to be like, ‘Yeah, that was me getting triggered and I should probably do some work,’ which I think is a step forward,” she adds.

Wonderlin cautions against learning about relationships from reality TV

Relationship drama on shows like “Love Is Blind” can be fun to watch. But Wonderlin says not to take them too seriously — and especially not to take them as templates for ideal relationships.

Growing up watching "The Bachelor" with her mom, Wonderlin says she used to mistake the show for reality.

“I really thought, 'Oh, that’s how it is. You just talk about stuff that you like, and then you just like right off into the sunset and get engaged after two months,'” she says.

She says people are "educated" about relationships by the media — which is a problem, because so much that happens on TV is "unrealistic."

Conflicts, Wonderlin says, are a normal part of relationships, even in early stages. “There are rough patches and attachment issues coming out. Arguments and dynamics forming," she says.

The key is learning how to resolve them — and this show is more interested in drama than resolution.