Most couples enjoy a honeymoon period after getting married, but Kody Brown says that his and Meri's idyllic phase didn't last very long.
The reality star, 53, opens up about his former marriage in the latest “Sister Wives: One on One” special and reveals that his relationship with Meri turned rocky shortly after they tied the knot in 1990.
“I married Meri and it was a hard relationship from the very beginning,” he tells host Sukanya Krishnan.
Three years after marrying, the couple introduced a second wife, Janelle Brown, into the mix. Looking back on that time, Kody believes that Janelle helped serve as a buffer in his strained relationship with Meri.
"It was like Janelle was a blessing of dilution. It diluted this relationship I had with Meri," he explains.
At the same time, Kody says that he was "bringing more people into a problem." He says the fact that Kody, Meri and Janelle were living in Meri's house in the early days of their plural marriage only added to the stress in their relationship.
"We get married and we're in Meri's house. Like, this is a woman who's already got domain over our place, you know?" he says.
When asked if Meri was "caustic" towards Janelle, Kody answers "absolutely" and says that Meri "might've been jealous" of Janelle.
“I’m in an established relationship with somebody that I don’t even get along with and then I bring somebody else in and then now it's like triangulating," he says. "And then we bring Christine in and that seemed to calm it because we started having children and we seemed to have this sort of more unified focus even though the strain was perpetual."
According to the father of 18, his plural marriage was "in the storm" shortly after it began.
In her own interview with Krishnan, Janelle then reveals that the family "really struggled" and butted heads over "everything" from laundry detergent to food in the early days. Rather than addressing the problems head-on, Janelle says that she used to let things go because she has a different communication style than Meri.
"Meri's really direct and I didn't know how to (deal with that). I'd never met anybody who was super direct like that and I was like, 'Whoa!' It was like almost offensive to me," she says.
Christine also shared her take on the family dynamics, saying that Meri is "more aggressive with her conversations" and "doesn't mind a confrontational conversation."
According to Christine, living in one house with Meri was "very stressful."
"I never knew if she was mad or not mad and the stress was so much. It just took me over the edge and (I was) like, 'I'm done with you,'" she says.
During the episode, Krishnan does not ask Meri for her take on the family dynamic that Kody, Christine and Janelle discuss. However, in one scene she does acknowledge the strain.
"I think with our family, raising all our kids together and just having all those amazing moments was so good. But you do also have to realize that as they grow and they start their own lives, the adults are figuring out who we are within this family as well," she says.
In a recent "Sister Wives" special that aired in December, Meri revealed that she and Kody were no longer married.
During Sunday’s episode, Meri addresses her breakup with Kody at length and implies that the split wasn't exactly up for discussion.
For instance, when asked if she gets to decide to walk away from Kody versus him leaving her, Meri says, “I think Kody has already decided. We have a lot of history and I love him and he has chosen not to love me and not to want a relationship with me.”
Meri also addresses Kody's recent claim that he considered reconciling with her while they were estranged.
"It's a little heartbreaking to me because of the fact that he could’ve given us a chance and now two years later he's like, 'Absolutely not,'" she explains.
"I have spent a lot of years full of hope, really looking inward and figuring myself out and becoming a better person and just hoping that that was good enough but it's not. He actually said those words to me that that's not good enough. It's hurtful but it also is what it is," she says.