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'Top Chef' recap: Taste? That's so last season

By Liane Bonin of HitFix.com Nine chefs left! Whoo!Isaac Mizrahi is in the house for some reason. Because he designs clothes that have good taste? Oh, no, because Padma is showing her jewelry line at Fashion Week, so we needed a tie-in. Nice plug, Padma! Subtle! And she’s wearing one of her own necklaces! Which looks like something I beaded at summer camp! Isaac’s new collection was inspired b

By Liane Bonin of HitFix.com

Nine chefs left! Whoo!

Isaac Mizrahi is in the house for some reason. Because he designs clothes that have good taste? Oh, no, because Padma is showing her jewelry line at Fashion Week, so we needed a tie-in. Nice plug, Padma! Subtle! And she’s wearing one of her own necklaces! Which looks like something I beaded at summer camp! Isaac’s new collection was inspired by his Xerox machine. Whaaaa? For the Quickfire Challenge, the judges will be going off of aesthetic beauty and will not be tasting the dishes. Mmm, sounds… pretty not tasty?  

We must get inside the minds of the chefs. Carla was a runway model in Paris. Fabio is inspired by the thought of a beautiful woman walking in the rain trying not to get wet. Okay. That translates to… nothing I’d want to eat. Antonia is making a tree. Tiffany is making flowers and dirt. Richard is making black ice cream. Angelo is making a bag of vomit, according to Fabio. I don’t think any of this sounds like it will either look OR taste good.

 

Isaac is kind of a bitch and I love it. He thinks Dale’s dish looks like table scraps, he thinks Tre’s dish is too simplistic and he give Angelo a thumbs down for writing on the table (and spelling “crocodile” wrong, I’m assuming). Fabio gets a thumbs up for his little tuna people, Carla’s food is a classic dress (this is a good thing) and Richard’s black ice cream is sophisticated. Isaac declares Richard the winner. I love Carla, but neurotic little Richard really is the one to beat.

For the elimination challenge, I’m sure they’re cooking at Rao’s. Where else do tables get passed down through family connections? Nice try at building suspense, Padma. Anyway, Frank Pelligrino, Frank Jr. and chef Dino Gatto will be the judges. Yup, Rao’s. It’s an Italian challenge. Fabio’s so psyched he’s doing the “gotta go now” dance. But, ugh, it’s a team challenge. I’m wondering if this might be a little smoother, though, since troublemakers like Marcel and Jamie are gone.

Lorraine Bracco and a guy in a god awful ugly vest will be joining the judges. Oh, he’s the bartender. Okay, you can wear sequins, pal. Oh, Anthony Bourdain is back! Let the games begin!

Read the full recap at Hitfix.com.