When you manage to have both members of the royal family and Oprah Winfrey on your speed dial, well, you're doing something right in life.
Of course, that doesn't mean that former Duchess of York and new reality star Sarah Ferguson hasn't totally learned from the past errors of her ways, and this week opened up to E! News about her friendship with Oprah, what she thinks of the queen, and just what was so triumphant about Princess Beatrice's infamous royal wedding fascinator.
Forget Oprah and those heirs, guess the person you really need on your speed dial is Joan Rivers.
The O.G. Fergie spoke to E! News in advance of the premiere of her new OWN reality show, Finding Sarah, this weekend, and while she was quick to take responsibility for her myriad past problems, the newly confident former royal was equally quick to boast about those things she's done right.
"One job I've done really well is be a good mom," she said, referring to Princesses Beatrice and Eugenie, the oft-photographed cousins of Princes William and Harry. "I'm really proud of that...I think that they are really first-rate, confident, secure strong girls. They have complete devotion of their mom and dad."
And vice versa. Fergie said that she did the show "completely with the support of Prince Andrew and the girls" and that it was her daughters who encouraged her to film.
"The girls said, 'Mom, we want to tell the world that you're a great mom. And that we love you. We want to do it.' Oprah didn't ask them, nobody asked them, they suggested it."
It was also Beatrice's own suggestion that she auction off the world's most infamous hat, putting her show-stealing (and not in a good way) royal wedding fascinator up on eBay.
"Wasn't it brilliant?" Sarah said. "Beatrice answered the media back beautifully. They did say she was wearing a satellite dish or something, but immediately it was her idea to turn it round, to auction her hat and thereby... $130,000 to UNICEF and Children in Crisis.
"Quite extraordinary. I think that's the best example of turning it around. Triumph in disaster."
As for her new boss and good pal Oprah, Sarah naturally only had glowing things to say about the woman she credits with helping turn her life around.
"When Oprah walks in a room, the room lights up. I have never met a more selfless, more special, more hugely powerful person...Probably, someone like Mr. [Nelson] Mandela, or His Holiness the Dalai Lama, or...or, the queen."
Against whom, she clearly holds no hard feelings.
"I think the Queen of England is a fantastic, iconic lady and an amazing grandmother to my girls."
Consider us royally impressed.
PHOTOS: Relive the madness in our gallery of Crazy Royal Hats: Special Wedding Edition!