Jada Pinkett Smith has been married to Will Smith for 11 years, and she revealed change and surprises — some of the sexual variety — are the secret to their happy home life.
“Pack a lunch and go to the park,” Pinkett Smith told Redbook’s July 2009 issue about her ideas for keeping a marriage strong. “Even a drive — and then pull over on the side of the road! Think of places outside that are comfortable to have sex. Does he have access to his office? Have a fantasy date. Be his secretary! Be sneaky. Your girlfriend’s house at a party. The bathroom! A guest bedroom! Just switch it up. Anything like that can keep it going. Anything it takes to keep the flame alive.”
Pinkett Smith also revealed she likes to dress up for her man.
“Nice outfits and high heels! And talking. And making time. You’ve got to make time,” she told the mag.
While they seem like the perfect couple, Pinkett Smith said she and Will often disagree on things, but that is part of why they love each other.
“We’re constantly surprising each other,” she said. “No matter what side of the scale one is on, the other will switch to keep the balance. We crack up about it all the time. We hardly every agree on anything, and we’ve learned to really respect that in our relationship. You might have an idea in your mind of what marriage is supposed to be, and you’re driving, driving, driving, toward this ideal picture. But you have to be open to the fact that your relationship is meant to be something else.”
One of the things Pinkett Smith revealed is central to their marriage, is openness.
“There’s a certain amount of safety you have to create for someone to feel like they can be open to you,” she told the mag. “That’s something we forget in marriage and relationships — they have to be places of safety, because they’re where you are most vulnerable. If you’re not allowed to be safe, I don’t know if you can reach the depths of conversation that support commitment.”