To recap this summer of superheroes, there's Thor (opened last month), Captain America (opening next month) and Green Lantern (opening Friday).
The crowd's enough to make a mere mortal ask: Is there any spandex-wearer who doesn't have a movie, a deal and/or an attached writer-director?
Not really. (Even Ant Man's a playa.) But after great effort we came up with a list. So, who deserves a close-up?
1. Wonder Woman: No, the Amazonian hasn't been ignored by Hollywood, but she hasn't been treated well, either. (And, since we're focusing on movies, not TV, this assessment doesn't count the failed NBC pilot, which, for what it's worth, did produce this entertaining read.) The short version is Wonder Woman is just like Superman, except with a bra and without a big-screen adventure. Not even the Flash, Luke Cage or poor Martian Manhunter have been in development hell for 70 years.
2. Batwing: He's new, he's flies, he reminds that white males don't own the patent on crime-fighting.
3. She-Hulk: So, let's get this straight: Hulk gets a movie, a reboot and, despite his lack of box-office prowess in both flicks, a spot in the upcoming The Avengers, while his cousin gets a Brigitte Nielsen promotional still for a never-was TV pilot?! Green males don't own the patent on crime-fighting, either.
4. Forever People: Wanna make Superman cool? Let him cameo alongside this trippy band of Jack Kirby hippies, just like the Man of Steel did back in the Day-Glo day. As an added bonus, the story would pit the crew against one of comics' all-time great baddies, Darkseid. (Why should the small-screen's Smallville have all the fun ?)
5. Super Goof: The Green Hornet tried, but failed to lighten up the increasingly solemn superhero flick. In lieu of another Fantasic Four sequel, how about letting Disney's goober-chomping doofus take some air out of the Caped Crusader's tires? And unlike Underdog, maligned in a 2007 film, Super Goof is supposed to be a doofus, so no heavy-handed dumbing-down would be necessary.
(Originally published June 13, 2011, at 6:44 a.m. PT--but we figured there was no better time than the eve of the Green Lantern premiere to whip this back out!)