Some jokes are just too hard to resist. David Letterman, who retired from show business and his "Late Show" in May, was happy to stay at home and watch his kid grow up until Donald Trump threw his hat in the ring as a presidential candidate.
Properly goaded, Letterman came out of retirement briefly Friday night, taking the stage at San Antonio's Majestic Theatre as a special guest of performers Martin Short and Steve Martin to deliver one of his classic Top 10 lists aimed directly at Trump.
"I have no regrets," he told the audience about retiring. "None. I was happy.
"Then a couple [of] days ago, Donald Trump said he was running for president," he continued. "I have made the biggest mistake of my life [by retiring], ladies and gentlemen."
With that, he read out the Top 10 Interesting Facts About Donald Trump, which included:
10. That thing on his head was the gopher in "Caddyshack."
8. Donald Trump looks like the guy in the lifeboat with the women and children.
5. Donald Trump weighs 240 pounds — 250 with cologne.
4. Trump would like all Americans to know that that thing on his head is free-range.
2. Donald Trump has pissed off so many Mexicans, he’s starring in a new movie entitled, “No Amigos” (That's a reference to 1986's "Three Amigos," which starred Short and Martin.)
So what was No. 1? Watch the video to find out!
And speaking of hair (as Letterman did so often in the list) ... how about his beard!