IE 11 is not supported. For an optimal experience visit our site on another browser.

‘Dancing’ features three-way tie for first

Melissa Rycroft, Gilles Marini, and Shawn Johnson all earned straight 9s from the three-judge panel this week, but cowboy Ty Murray was probably the most improved dancer. But Woz, oh, Woz...
/ Source: msnbc.com contributor

“We’re back with another week of dramatic injuries!” said co-host Samantha Harris breathlessly, and thus began the third performance show of this year’s “Dancing With The Stars.” In fact, it was the least injury-plagued episode yet, not that this should slow the wound-promoting juggernaut.

First up was Denise Richards, who had tentatively improved last week, but who bombed with her samba, even after her partner, Maksim Chmerkovskiy, showed up in a pink dress to loosen her up. Denise lacks rhythm and grace, and she always — as judge Carrie-Ann Inaba pointed out — looks terrified, like she’s taking a test she hasn’t studied for. Their samba was plodding and lifeless, and received only 16 points. For the third time out, that’s pretty bad. (For comparison, Cloris Leachman’s third performance last season earned a 15.)

Next up were Chuck Wicks and Julianne Hough doing a foxtrot. Chuck didn’t let Julianne dance all around him this time, but he still needs some work on his posture. He oddly gives the impression of having legs and arms that are about six inches longer than he thinks, and there’s a lack of fluidity that judge Len Goodman chalked up to not standing up straight. He and Julianne had reason to be happy with two 8s and a 7.

For someone who is supposed to be sexy, Playboy model Holly Madison produced an almost comically awkward samba, in which some of her movements looked a bit more funky chicken than Latin steamy. She missed steps, her feet pointed in the wrong direction, and the fact that two out of three judges complimented her chest didn’t bode well for her scores, which added up to a meager 17.

Viewers then learned what became of Steve-O, who survived last week even after injuring himself during rehearsal and winding up in the hospital. His partner, Lacey Schwimmer, vowed to make the foxtrot easy on him so he wouldn’t reinjure his back. (That Steve-O is a cautious fellow!) While he dropped a few steps, he demonstrated substantially more promise than anyone anticipated. His 15 points frankly seemed a little harsh, given that the steps he got right looked much better than Holly’s.

A good week for the athletes
One of last week’s surprises was an improved Lawrence Taylor, who faced the samba this week and said he was “stressing.” Much to his own shock, he found himself even sacrificing a golf game to rehearse. His performance wasn’t great, but for the first time, he showed a bit of the warm likability that has buoyed buff athletes in the past. The judges pointed out that he needs more hip action, then gave him 20 points, a decent showing for a guy who doesn’t seem to have arrived with fully operational joints.

Gymnast Shawn Johnson continues to act her age, showing off the adorable Mark Ballas to her jealous friends via Webcam (wouldn’t you, at 17?) as she started to learn the foxtrot. Her specialty has not been smooth elegance, so she seemed more nervous than ever. She looked lovely, however, and her athleticism and flexibility gave the dance instant credibility that no one had yet demonstrated. Her 27 points were well deserved.

The judges have been very impressed — perhaps a little too impressed — with obscure actor Gilles Marini, who has topped the judges’ scores for two straight weeks. The samba played directly to his sweet spot, which is the kind of overt sexuality that, after all, made him the tiniest bit “famous” in the “Sex And The City” movie to begin with. It was a good samba, though nothing special technique-wise, but it wasn’t surprising that he landed three 9s, just in deference to the overall effect.

Comedian David Alan Grier had a rough time last week, and he worked hard in practice to set up a “breakthrough performance” with his foxtrot. While it wasn’t exactly a “breakthrough,” it was certainly his best showing, and the first time that he looked comfortable doing his own dancing, instead of having partner Kym Johnson dance around him. While his timing was flawed and his footwork imperfect, there was a little nut of charm at the center of the dance, and he judges rewarded him with a much improved 24 points.

It wouldn’t be a week of “Dancing” without an injury, and this week’s was the second for the already broken-footed Steve Wozniak. He pulled a hamstring during practice, and it’s not like he could really spare the rehearsal time. Could he even survive the samba? Sort of. He looked like he always looks: disorganized and not graceful, with the addition of The Worm, which is not an entirely authentic samba element. Carrie-Ann called him “cute,” but also said that “the novelty wears off.” Len: “Terrible from start to finish.” Bruno: “The worst samba I’ve ever seen.” The total: 10 points, which is probably the worst score in history not given to Master P as the judges were trying to force him off the show.

“Bachelor” participant Melissa Rycroft once again claimed discomfort with elements of the foxtrot, but once again, she looked every bit the trained dancer/performer in a field of genuine amateurs. Len still urged her to get off her ballet toes, but the judges were broadly positive — except for an odd comment from Carrie-Ann, who couldn’t think of anything negative to say, but insisted that something was “lacking.” Still, Melissa scored the third straight strip of 9s of the week, tying her with Gilles and Shawn.

One of the surprising contenders has been Lil’ Kim, who has tremendous charisma and appeal, and whose booty-shaking skills fit the samba perfectly. It’s easy to chalk her success up to her uninhibited approach, but she also danced pretty well — not perfectly, but with enough skill to back up the passionate delivery and not wind up being, as the judges might say, “all sizzle and no sausage.” She and Derek Hough wound up with 25 points, a good score for Week 3.

Closing the show was a foxtrot from cowboy Ty Murray, who looked awful in the first week and substantially better last week. He seemed completely lost in rehearsal, but he’s developing a nice chemistry with partner Chelsie Hightower. Chelsie fell during the dance, but they recovered, and he continued one of the more dramatic arcs of improvement in the show’s history. “It was just top-notch, I’m so pleased,” Len said. For Ty to get 23 points in a dance where his partner hit the floor was a feat indeed.

There are, increasingly, three easily distinguished groups of dancers: there are Melissa, Gilles, and Shawn; then there are Kim, Chuck, Lawrence, Ty, and David; then there are Steve-O, Denise, Holly, and Steve. It seems unlikely that any of the bottom group can escape, or that the middle group can best the top group, so the results will likely turn predictable.

Steve Wozniak has to be the most obvious candidate for booting, but it could easily be any of those bottom four, depending on votes. But most importantly, nothing about these performances changed the apparent inevitability of an ultimate Gilles-Melissa showdown. And without a significant stepping-up from someone, that’s where we’re headed.

Linda Holmes is a frequent contributor to msnbc.com