His show on the verge of cancellation? His parents trying to take control of his assets? In an exclusive exchange with E! News, Charlie Sheen is clearing up all the rumors himself.
Here's what he had to say about his troubles, the false stories and his undying love for his fans.
"All crap," he told us via text.
"Believe nothing. I will never speak about any of this as long as I'm alive. You're all gonna have to keep towing the same redundant line, guessing wrong."
He's obviously following the news, because Sheen suggested the focus on his situation was overblown.
"BTW, two wars are in an endless state of sorrow. Egypt about burned to the ground, and all you people care about is my bullsh-t....?"
"Shame shame shame," he said.
We wished the troubled actor well and told him people really do just want to see him get healthy and happy and return to work.
"Absolutely I see that," he said. "For that I am grateful."
There you have it. Straight from the Sheen himself.
Within minutes of our exchange, his rep, Stan Rosenfield, issued a much more sedate statement on behalf of the star. You can compare and contrast:
"I have a lot of work to do to be able to return the support I have received from so many people. I want to say thank you to my fellow castmembers, the crew of Two and a Half Men and everyone at CBS and Warner Bros., especially [CBS CEO] Les Moonves and [Warner Bros. TV President] Bruce Rosenblum for their concern and support," the statement says.
"And to my fans, your good wishes have touched me very much. Like Errol Flynn, who had to put down his sword on occasion, I just want to say thank you."
Let's hope he's able to pick up the sword again soon, and not hurt anyone with it--including himself.