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Ashton Kutcher explains why he's keeping his 'spite' mustache

Ashton Kutcher opens up to Jimmy Fallon about why he won't shave his "spite 'stache" and how he wound up with it in the first place.

Ashton Kutcher hates his mustache. But he’s not shaving it.

The actor appeared on “The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon” on Monday night and explained just why he’s sporting a thin mustache — and, no, it’s not for a role.

“This is for real life,” he said. "I never intended to have this. I don't think I look good with it, but I'm keeping it," the actor, 41, announced.

So, how, exactly, did Kutcher wind up with what he called a piece of “lip jewelry?”

He said that his wife, Mila Kunis, told him they had to go to a birthday party for her friend, Adele, adding that the theme of the bash was 1970s New Year’s.

The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon - Season 6
Kutcher explains to Jimmy Fallon how he wound up with a mustache he hates.NBC

"We were both on 'That '70s Show.' I think we got this," he said, unconcerned at the time that he could pull it off.

The "Ranch" star really got into the spirit of things, too, putting on bell bottoms, boots, a vest and a scarf to make up his ensemble. He then trimmed his beard to get a really thin mustache.

“It’s like a high school boy trying to grow a mustache, but it looks great for the party, right?” he said.

Things took a turn for the unexpected, though, when they arrived at the party and Kutcher noticed he was the only person in 1970s attire. Why? It turns out Kutcher, who said Kunis was in the clear because she wore “a timeless jumper,” was about four decades past the actual time period being celebrated.

“The theme for the party’s 1930s New Year's and I look like Burt Reynolds from ‘Boogie Nights' and I’m like, ‘This is a joke.’" he said. "So, I'm just playing it off like this is how I'm doing it these days. Like, 'What's up Jay-Z? Yeah, this is my thing now.'"

Kutcher has since committed to the hairy look, though, especially since Kunis has given it a thumbs up. "It was really awkward. So now it's a spite 'stache, and I'm keeping it," he said. "This is payback. It’s a full-blown spite ‘stache and now she likes it, so now I can’t get rid of it.”