They say you turn into your parents at some point, but along the way to that inevitability, you first have to understand them. A new study says that lightbulb moment where you realize mom and dad were really onto something—and weren’t trying to ruin your life after all—typically happens at around age 27.
The study of around 2,000 British families, courtesy of Paramount Picture (via The Daily Mail), found that it takes about a decade to truly get past the butting of heads that happens during the teenager years and see your parents for what they were: people who tried their best to raise you right—even if you didn’t always like it. According to the study, this realization is most often triggered by comparing how you were brought up vs. the upbringing of other people. However, women seem more prone to appreciating their parents given time; twice as many adult women as men go to their parents regularly for advice.
And parents trudging through the teen years now: Take solace in the fact that three-quarters of respondents said in retrospect they should have shown their parents more respect. In other words, she does actually hate you now—but she’s going to feel really bad about it in 10 years.
A version of this story originally appeared on iVillage.