The Easter holiday on April 9 is nearly here, and many parents are counting down to egg hunts and basket decorating with their kids. But some might be wondering: Is my kid too old for an Easter basket?
Some parents have a hard cut-off for holiday fanfare like Easter baskets, while others want to keep the magic alive a bit longer.
Kara Cargill, a picture book author based in South Carolina, was chatting with her husband about the Easter basket gift she'd planned for her son, who was 15 at the time. Her husband, however, thought she shouldn't bother. "He's too old," he said.
"Well, I'm still going to do one anyway," Cargill replied.
"I'm probably going to be one of those moms that always does it," she tells TODAY.com.
After the exchange with her husband, she took to Twitter to ask friends for their opinions.
"My husband says my 15 and a half year old son is too old for an Easter basket. I still did one anyway. What are your Thoughts?" Cargill tweeted.
What she didn’t expect was for that post to go viral.
Many responded that of course there's no limit on the tradition. Others thought that by a certain age, kids should outgrow egg hunts and a belief in the Easter bunny, but Easter baskets? The consensus was clear: No one is too old.
And experts agree.
Dr. Candice Jones, a pediatrician in Orlando, Florida, tells TODAY.com that the best way to figure out whether or not to make a basket for your child is simple: just ask them.
"These family traditions and holidays are very fun and loving, and many children look forward to them," Jones says. "And so for us, as parents and adults, to make the determination that they're too old may be a little unfair."
Start the conversation
The best way to approach this conversation is simple: First, relax. Then broach the subject by asking the child for his or her thoughts on the tradition. "Easter's coming up, what do you think?" Jones suggests saying.
Related: 41 Easter basket stuffers for the kid who’s interested in more than just candy
Having these conversations is part of maintaining healthy relationships and staying connected with children as they grow, Jones adds, even when it’s over something as seemingly small as an Easter basket.
“If you think enough to ask them their opinion about that, that encourages more dialogue when things really, really matter,” she says.
Some kids may say no to an Easter basket or other childhood traditions in order to prove that they are maturing, according to parenting and resilience expert Dr. Deborah Gilboa. But parents should ask again later, she advises.
"Sometimes kids just want to know that they are allowed to say 'no,' and then they go back to saying 'yes,'" she tells TODAY.com.
What about the Easter bunny?
Belief in the magical creatures who leave gifts under pillows or trees is part of many childhood experiences. Children usually grow out of these beliefs naturally due to their social context, Jones says. But it never hurts to watch out for that progression and start a conversation when those beliefs start to end.
Gilboa cautions that when children start asking about the existence of these figures, it's important that the child doesn't feel like they've been lied to. She's heard of many parents who say that "Santa is an idea, not a person." The same can be said for the Easter bunny.
"There's this idea, and once you're old enough you get to be a part of the helping instead of the receiving, or the helping and the receiving," Gilboa encourages parents to say.
Related: 27 fun Easter gift ideas for teens
Evolving traditions
As kids age, it might be best to get creative when approaching the Easter holiday, says Michele Borba, an educational psychologist and the author of “Thrivers: The Surprising Reasons Why Some Kids Struggle and Others Shine.”
Instead of a basket, some kids may prefer a gift bag with some of their favorite trinkets or even just some candy and treats, Borba suggests. And instead of participating in an Easter egg hunt, some may prefer helping hide the eggs for younger siblings or neighbors.
Easter is an example of a family tradition that can become a core memory for kids as they age, she adds.
“I think we’ve got to get beyond ‘it’s just a basket,’” Borba tells TODAY.com. “It’s the meaning behind the basket.”
Related: 15 festive finds to make Easter eggs-tra special
For many families, Easter might not be the most meaningful and memorable tradition for children.
In Dr. Deborah Gilboa's family, a different tradition has proven to be enduring. On each child's birthday, she decorates their bedroom before they wake up. Once her kids reached middle school, she started asking them whether they still thought it was fun.
So far, each of them, including her oldest, who is 19, has said yes, Gilboa says.
It’s worth finding out what traditions matter most is in order to preserve them over time. Borba recommends that parents ask their children: What are the family traditions that you’ll tell your kids about later on? The answers may be surprising.
After conducting focus groups with children across the country, Borba says one thing kids miss most right now is fun. Finding out what traditions and activities spark that sense of fun can bolster family relationships. Many possibilities are small things that “don’t have to cost a dime,” Borba said, such as movie nights or certain sweet or funny rituals.
“They love the predictability of it,” Borba says. “And right now, in an uncertain world, the predictability of ‘let’s keep doing that’ can be really fun.”
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