"My 4-year-old can count to 30!"
"How sweet! My McKayla can count to 20 -- in Spanish."
"Oh, Brayden loves to count in Spanish. Of course, we've moved on to Mandarin now."
Ugh, competition. Make that MOMpetition. It strikes all moms now and then -- and some are afflicted worse than others. We all think our kids are great, but do you find yourself one-upping your friends with stories about your little darling's beauty and brilliance? Or worse, do you have a friend who is a little too competitive?
TODAY asked two experts for their advice on handling mompetition.
Debra Shigley, author of "The Go-Getter Girl's Guide," offers the following tips:
1. Check yourself. Feeling like you're surrounded by mompetition? Sometimes you might be inviting it. Feeling pride is a good thing, but sometimes we believe we need to be stressed-out in order to be doing a good job. Really, we don't!
2. Have things to talk about other than your kids. If you define yourself solely through your children's accomplishments, you're probably going to fall into the mompetition trap. Read a book, volunteer: Do something that makes you feel fulfilled (other than changing poopy diapers!).
3. Disengage with a comeback. If you know the next time you see SuperMom she's going to go on and on about how tired she is because she's so busy with her kids' piano recitals and honors classes and baking organic wheat-free cupcakes from scratch for the entire school, try saying something like, "Wow, that sounds exhausting. What are you going to do to take care of yourself?" It might throw her off-guard enough to squash the one-upping.
4. Give yourself a break. No mom is perfect, so don't hold yourself to some unattainable standard. Pat yourself on the back for doing your best, and surround yourself with friends who are confident, not insecure, about their own parenting skills.
Stacy Kaiser, author of "How to Be a Grown-Up," has these suggestions:
1. If you can't beat them, join them. Tell the other mom what you think is great about their kid -- voila, no more competition.
2. Make an equalizing statement such as, "Wow, we are both so lucky to have such terrific kids!"
3. Change the subject. The weather, a new restaurant, college basketball...
4. Identify what's happening in a light way. Say something like, "I feel like if someone was listening to us, they'd think we were competing with each other! Weird, huh? I would never want to do that with you."
Do you have any stories about mompetition? And how do you deal with it? Share your thoughts in the comments.