I admit, I am not a fan of baby showers. I don't like tea, I don't enjoy poopy diaper games, and I'd take a cheeseburger over a crustless cucumber sandwich any day of the week. But when I was hugely pregnant with my first daughter, I let my best friend talk me into having one anyway.
"You need a ton of stuff," she pleaded.
"I can just buy it myself," I argued.
"It's expensive," she said. "Plus, people love baby showers. And they'll buy you presents anyway. It's just a fun little get-together."
I agreed, but only under the condition that it be co-ed, and that everyone else could drink booze. I figured it was the least I could do if they were giving up an afternoon to watch me fawn over handkerchief-size blankets and wrap toilet paper around my swollen middle. Seems the lovely expecting Kate Middleton likely won't have to endure any such torture. According to The Huffington Post, baby showers aren't customary in the UK to begin with. But more importantly, it would be considered hugely inappropriate for the wealthy Royal family to go trolling for baby gifts.
I'm relieved for the Duchess but I have to say, it would be pretty awesome to watch the Queen speed-chugging beer out of a baby bottle.
Jenna McCarthy is an internationally published writer, TED speaker and the author of five books including If It Was Easy They'd Call the Whole Damn Thing a Honeymoon: Living with and Loving the TV-Addicted, Sex-Obsessed, Not-so-handy Man You Married (Berkley Books, 2011). Find her at JennaMcCarthy.com.
A version of this story originally appeared on iVillage.