Hilaria Baldwin gave an emotional update Tuesday night after days of speculation that she was having a miscarriage.
"There was no heartbeat today at my scan...so it’s over," Baldwin said in an Instagram post with a photo of her four children and husband, actor Alec Baldwin. "But I have some pretty strong and amazing heartbeats right here."
Earlier Tuesday, Baldwin spoke with Savannah Guthrie and Hoda Kotb in her first interview since sharing in another heartbreaking Instagram post last week that she suspected she was going through a miscarriage. Baldwin gave the interview before going to an ultrasound scan.
"I think I'm going to have the answer one way or the other,'' she said. "I'm pretty sure that this is not gonna stick. When we agree to be parents, we have to accept the good and the bad."
In two previous ultrasound visits, Baldwin said the technician was able to hear only a faint heartbeat at lengthy intervals.
Baldwin, 35, who has four children with her husband husband, opened up on TODAY about the importance of women speaking about their pregnancy struggles and the stigma surrounding miscarriage.
"I'm feeling OK,'' Baldwin said. "This is something that has not been easy, and I understand it. I wanted to come out and speak about it because it's something so many people deal with, and as women we're trained to deal with it silently. (...) I don't think we have to live with such fear."
Baldwin first revealed her struggles when she wrote in an Instagram post last week that she was "most likely experiencing a miscarriage."
"So, this is what is going on now: the embryo has a heartbeat, but it isn’t strong, and the baby isn’t growing very much. So we wait — and this is hard. So much uncertainty...but the chances are very, very small that this is a viable pregnancy," she wrote.
"I’m feeling a bit fragile and I need support. I’m hoping, that by sharing this, I can contribute to raising awareness about this sensitive topic."
On Tuesday, Baldwin revealed the reason behind taking the photo of herself with her stomach showing.
"This is also my baby. I take these belly photos (with every pregnancy) and this baby deserves the same kind of love, and attention, and acceptance as the other ones even if it’s not going to stick around for very long,'' she said.
Baldwin also spoke about how bringing awareness to the issue also means assuaging women's fears that the miscarriage is their fault.
"Of course everybody is different, but if you're having a strong, healthy pregnancy, there's not a lot you can do to hurt it,'' Baldwin said on Tuesday. "That being said, we should do as right as we can by our children, but we just need to be a little more forgiving of ourselves and not so much perfectionists because it's hard enough as it is."
Baldwin also faced criticism on her Instagram post, and she answered back after reading a negative comment.
"Nothing is private anymore…good god you’re annoying…" the person wrote.
"I would suggest that you go through and read even just a handful of comments from people who have experienced the same thing. And maybe your heart and compassion will grow,'' Baldwin answered. "Because this evil exists too … and it’s not ok."
Baldwin has no regrets about publicly sharing a painful time in her life.
"For me personally, it would be harder to do it silently," she said. "Being open for me just allowed me relief a little bit,'' she said. "To people, secrets are only scary when they're secrets. Once you let the secret out, it's not so scary anymore."
Though there have been negative comments, Baldwin said the response overall has been supportive. She also has gotten helpful knowledge from other women who have been through miscarriages.
"I got great advice,'' she said. "This is something I've never gone through before. And women came on my Instagram or stopped on the street and gave me such wisdom. This isn't about me, this is about all of us."