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Perfect date night for Mother’s Day

For all of you new dads out there who botched the roses and romance on Valentine's Day, consider Mother’s Day your second chance to show a little tenderness
/ Source: TODAY contributor

For all of you dads out there who botched the roses and romance on Valentine's Day, consider Mother’s Day — and the night before — your second chance to show a little tenderness.

As our children become top of mind, our relationships invariably fall to the bottom of the to-do list. Some studies report that more than 90 percent of all new parents experience a decline in relationship satisfaction, and one of the biggest complaints I hear from new moms is that they just don’t feel sexy anymore.

Admittedly, it’s hard to feel sexy when you’ve been peed-on, puked-on, pooped-on and haven’t showered in days or hit the gym in weeks.

So this Mother’s Day I’m taking a different approach to celebrating her.

I'll let the boys show how much they care on Sunday, with the homemade cards and the “delicious” breakfast-in-bed.

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I'll spend my quality time with her the evening before — focusing on the woman inside the mom.

• Step 1: I'll start Saturday by booking her a massage and pedicure. I want her to feel pampered and doted on, and I can’t think of anyone who deserves it more. Most moms spend way too much time having to be the experts of everything when it comes to the kids, and admittedly my attitude as a dad is sometimes, well, a little stand-offish. I’m like the National Guard: Ready to be called in for back-up as-needed. Well this Mother’s Day I’m going to surprise everyone as I make my way to the front-lines of parenting and give my wife some much-needed R&R.

• Step 2: A few days before the big night, I'll call my wife’s sisters and get some suggestions for a spring dress that will make her feel sexy, feminine and womanly — not motherly. Not that I don’t know what is and isn’t sexy, but sometimes my concept of sexy runs afoul of my wife’s. Sure, all of this doting and pampering can add up dollar-wise — and we haven’t even gotten to dinner yet — but the truth is that in this recession we’re all so worried about money that the first thing we usually sacrifice is the money we might otherwise invest in our relationship. But a happy family begins and ends with a happy couple, so I can’t think of money better invested than in my relationship with my wife. Besides, the kids are making homemade cards so we have a little room in our Mother’s Day budget.

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• Step 3: Speaking of my sisters-in-law, I’m going to ask them to meet up with her Saturday evening for a glass of wine and appetizers while I deal with the babysitter and figure out dinner for the boys. I’ll meet up with my wife at a restaurant she’s been dying to try, but there will be one rule for the evening: no conversation about the kids. That’s right: no discussion of schools or sibling rivalry, no talk of playful parenting strategies, or rewards versus consequences, none of it! Sometimes I feel like all we ever talk about are the kids, and I wonder what happened to our individuality. This Mother’s Day, I’m going to prove that we can leave our roles as parents behind for a couple of hours and actually make conversation. So what the heck will we talk about?

• Step 4: I plan to do a little “show and tell” over dinner, namely by digging out some old photos of us together pre-kids: our first vacation together, our honeymoon, maybe even the photos where I surprised her as she was coming out of the shower and made her blush — photos that embody my love and desire for my wife before our love-nest became the family roost.

• Step 5: We’ll get home, and I’ll check on the kids. Sure, my wife can take a peek just to see that they’re sleeping soundly, but the night will still be young and I’ll be damned if our bedroom isn’t going to get a little “boudoir-action.” That means no e-mail, no washing up and getting into pajamas, no hours of flossing — just some old-fashioned can’t-keep-my-hands-off-of-you.

After all, the next morning is Mother’s Day — and she gets to sleep until the kids finish making breakfast!