Heard at the 63rd annual Primetime Emmy Awards:
"Modern Family was this close to being animated. That's how much we didn't want to work with kids." — "Modern Family" co-creator Steve Levitan acknowledging the child actors on the show as he accepts the award for outstanding comedy series.
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"We are showing the world that there's absolutely nothing wrong in a relationship between an old man and a hot young woman. Looking around this room, I see many of you agree." — Steve Levitan, co-creator of "Modern Family," as he accepts the award for outstanding comedy series.
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"It was delightful working on 'Mildred Pierce.' I got to have sex with Kate Winslet many, many times. (Looking at Kate Winslet in the audience.) Thank you for allowing me to insert myself into your world of Mildred."— Guy Pearce, as he accepts the award for supporting actor in a mini-series, "Mildred Pierce."
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"I love being your good wife and I'm so grateful you have no political aspirations." — Julianna Margulies to her husband, as she accepts the award for outstanding lead actress in drama series "The Good Wife," in which she plays a politician's wife.
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"Welcome back to the 'Modern Family' award show. We've decided to throw them into the drama category and see what happens." — Host Jane Lynch, upon returning from a commercial break after "Modern Family" sweeps the first slate of awards.
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"There's Betty White. She's the reason we start the show at 5 p.m. on the West Coast." — Host Jane Lynch as she opens the show, referring to the 89-year-old White's age.
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"Katie Holmes is in the audience. I'd love to say something funny about her but I'm scared of her husband" (Tom Cruise) — Host Jane Lynch, as she opens the show.
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"Real life handed us the stories. My children walked in on my wife and I while we were in the act...Thank you to my somewhat satisfied wife and to my three traumatized children." — "Modern Family" co-creator Steve Levitan, accepting the award for writing on comedy series.