This story discusses suicide. If you or someone you know is in crisis, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 800-273-8255, text HOME to 741741 or visit SpeakingOfSuicide.com/resources for additional resources.
One month after the death of country legend Naomi Judd, her daughter and former musical partner, Wynonna Judd, is reflecting on the impact of the loss, especially in light of her mother's mental health struggle.
"There is so much happening in the world right now," Wynonna Judd, 58, one-half of the popular country duo The Judds, wrote in an Instagram post Sunday. "Before I sat down to write this, I thought, 'No…I just don’t know what to say.' Then, I heard the words from my life coach asking me, 'What do you know?' And I began to cry."
The Grammy winner went on to describe "the pain of losing Mom on 4/30 to suicide" as "so great," adding: "I often feel like I’m not ever going to be able to fully accept and surrender to the truth that she left the way she did. This cannot be how The Judds story ends."
Naomi Judd died on April 30 from a self-inflicted firearm wound, one day before she was scheduled to be inducted into the Country Music Hall of Fame, TODAY previously reported. Wynonna Judd and her sister, Ashley Judd, wrote in a statement at the time that they lost their "beautiful mother to the disease of mental illness."
In her post over the weekend, Wynonna Judd shared her hopes to better herself, inspired by her first grandchild, Kaliyah, born 2 1/2 weeks before Naomi Judd died.
"I DO know, that in order to be a healthier grandparent to my firstborn grandchild ... to break the cycle of addiction & family dysfunction, that I must continue to show up for myself {first} and do the personal healing work," she wrote. "I know that it is a simple steps program, and those steps are not easy to take at times. Therefore, I’ve made a commitment to keep doing the 'next right thing,' and schedule weekly appointments so that I continue with the ongoing work, even when I have good days."
"I DO know, that I feel so helpless—right now especially," Wynonna Judd continued, before referencing one of her hit songs with her mother. "I DO know, that as corny as it sounds, 'Love Can Build A Bridge.' I find myself humming the song that Mom wrote for the fans, to myself here on the farm at night."
"I really DO know, that I’m not able to do this grieving thing all by myself, and that it’s okay to reach out for help. I will continue to fight for my faith, for my SELF, for my family, and I WILL continue to show up & sing," she wrote, adding, "Thank you all for your love and support. Let’s check in more often."
Earlier this month, Ashley Judd spoke out about their mother's cause of death and experience with depression.
“When we’re talking about mental illness, it’s very important to be clear and to make the distinction between our loved one and the disease," she told ABC News. "It’s very real, and it lies, it’s savage."
During a 2017 visit to TODAY, Naomi Judd recalled unexpectedly falling into a “dark hole of depression” several years prior.
“I didn’t get off my couch for two years,” Naomi Judd said. “I was so depressed that I couldn’t move. ... My husband (Larry Strickland) and my girlfriends and Ashley would come over and I would just go upstairs and lock the door to my bedroom. ... You become immobilized.”
The day after announcing their mother's death, Wynonna and Ashley Judd thanked her fans for their support at the Country Music Hall of Fame induction.
“My momma loved you so much, and she appreciated your love for her, and I’m sorry that she couldn’t hang on until today,” Ashley Judd said. “Your esteem for her and regard for her really penetrated her heart, and it was your affection for her that did keep her going in these last few years.”
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