“What was it that day when you’re six years sober, what happens that you just decide to throw it all away?” DeGeneres asked.
“I have to preface it with, I got sober at 19,” Lovato said. “I got sober at an age where I wasn’t even legally allowed to drink. And I got the help that I needed at the time. And I took on the approach of a one-size-fits-all solution, which is sobriety, just sobriety.”
Lovato, who performed the national anthem at last month’s Super Bowl, said that was the right answer for a long stretch of time, but her life spiraled out of control due to her eating disorder.
“Just little things like that led me to being really, really unhappy. My bulimia got really bad and I asked for help and I didn’t receive the help that I needed," she said. "And so I was stuck in this unhappy position and here I am sober and I’m thinking to myself, ‘I’m six years sober, but I’m miserable. I’m even more miserable than I was when I was drinking. Why am I sober?'"
The "Cool for the Summer" singer says she contacted people on her team about her concerns, but said she was told she was being "very selfish" and putting their livelihoods at risk.
Lovato, whose new song, “I Love Me,” comes out Friday, said that response left her feeling "completely abandoned" and led to her relapse.
“So I drank, and that night I went to a party and there was other stuff there, and it was only three months before I ended up in the hospital with an OD," she said.
In August 2018, E! News reported the former Disney star had entered rehab following a drug overdose on July 24. She returned home in November after a 90-day stay and continued to receive treatment at a sober living facility, according to reports at the time.
Speaking to DeGeneres, Lovato said it was her decision to get sober again — and she wanted any viewers and fans struggling with addiction to know they could do the same.
"If you do go through this, you yourself can get through it," she said. “You can get to the other side and it may be bumpy, but you are a 10 out of 10. Don’t forget it. And, as long as you take the responsibility, you can move past it and learn to love yourself that way that you deserve to be loved."