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Complaining just might be the secret to a happy relationship

by Ree Hines /  / Updated  / Source: TODAY

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If you think you have to hold your tongue to keep you and your partner happy, think again!

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Relationship researchers say you should actually complain if you really want a strong, long-lasting bond.

RELATED: 10 couples reveal their secrets to a strong relationship

"I would have thought a really high threshold of negativity, where you let things go on and let your partner be themselves would be more successful," Dr. Hanna Fry, author of "The Mathematics of Love," said during a Tuesday talk at the Cheltenham Science Festival.

But that's not what she's found to be true.

"The couples who end up doing best have a really low negativity threshold," she explained. "When things bother them, they speak up immediately and don't let small things spill out of control."

But don't just take her word for it. Fry looked at the work of mathematicians John Gottmann and James Murray, who came up with a formula to explain it all.

RELATED: How to have a happy marriage by lowering your expectations

Relationship formula
Relationship formulaTODAY

Well, maybe her explanation is a bit easier for the rest of us to understand.

In short, as she explained in a TED Talk last year, complaining actually gives couples a chance to fix problems as they arise, rather than keeping calm and enduring quiet frustrations.

Follow Ree Hines on Google+. This story was originally published in June 2015.

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