Breezing is the newest dating term and if you're a doubter, read on because it's how Jenna Dewan scored Channing Tatum.
"I thought about when I first met Jenna. I knew our connection was really powerful, but I wasn’t sure what our relationship was going to be," the actor wrote in Cosmopolitan.
"Then one day, Jenna just blurted out that she knew exactly what she wanted in life and she didn’t have to look for it anymore because it was me. She had no idea what I’d say or how I’d react, but that was her truth. I remember feeling this incredible rush — it was the sexiest thing she’d ever done for me."
Jenna "breezed." She was easy-breezy, didn't give a care about "The Rules" of dating (letting him make the first move and playing the "man"), gender roles, playing games and so on — she just told Channing straight up how she felt. No holds barred. Attainable. Breezy.
Isn't that a relief? Just be yourself — say what you mean, mean what you say, don't worry about "shoulds" and just go for it. Here are some tips to be "good" breezy:
1. Stop playing text games
If you like someone, text them back immediately. Don't wait three days. In this day of authenticity and a rapidly changing dating landscape, act quickly!
2. Be kind and have good delivery of your words and messages
Have you ever noticed how Southern women can say just about anything and get away with it? They make flirty eye contact, smile and get to their point. When you have something to say, make sure you smile and seem breezy! If you're writing a text or email, use a smiley face emoji to indicate warmth and happiness (don't use ten of them — just one is fine)!
3. Be willing to be honest with yourself and your partner
If you're looking for long-term committed love and marriage, say so! The first date probably isn't the right time for this, but as you get to know the person over several weeks, it's great to talk about what you're truly looking for. If your needs don't match with your partner's needs, it's OK to breeze out before you waste too much time on something that isn't going to work long-term.
4. Don't overshare on a first date!
Breezing means being authentic, easy breezy, but NOT sharing what we would consider TMI (too much information)! On a first date, don't overshare about your skeletons, meds, divorces, bad relationships, sexual partners and so on. Be real and put your fun self forward — save the deeper darker subjects for dates that are a few weeks down the road! If you share too much too soon on a first date, you may scare them away!
As a date coach, helping people to find healthy, lasting love, I love "breezing." It allows us to be free and do what we want, whether we are men or women! Embrace the breeze, get rid of the games and jump into the dating pool this summer!
Dating coach Bela Gandhi is the founder and president of Smart Dating Academy.
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