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Jeff Rossen investigates...his napkin obsession

I’d like to apologize to all the fast food restaurants I’ve bankrupted. I’d also like to offer my apologies to the NBC commissary.You see, while most people grab a napkin or two with their meal, I grab 15 to 20. And I prefer the big white napkins, not the small, square ones. The larger, rectangular ones are tops. Just sayin’…They say the first step is admitting you have a problem. Here g
Jeff Rossen gets cuddly comfort from his napkins.
Jeff Rossen gets cuddly comfort from his napkins.Jeff Rossen / Today

I’d like to apologize to all the fast food restaurants I’ve bankrupted. I’d also like to offer my apologies to the NBC commissary.

You see, while most people grab a napkin or two with their meal, I grab 15 to 20. And I prefer the big white napkins, not the small, square ones. The larger, rectangular ones are tops. Just sayin’…

They say the first step is admitting you have a problem. Here goes: I have a problem.

There are never too many napkins for Rossen.
There are never too many napkins for Rossen.Jeff Rossen / Today

I wish I could say this is a result of my own reporting about unsanitary conditions at restaurants. I wish I could say this is a matter of keeping clean. Nope. This is simply a weird habit. Napkins make me feel safe. A “blankie,” if you will. When I feel food on my face, it makes me feel nice to look down and see a dozen options -- right there in front of me. I think to myself, “I can make a complete mess, and I’m all good.”

For many of you, this makes no sense. To me, it makes complete sense.

I’m shocked that the fast food industry hasn’t caught on. I do it fast -- ripping napkins from the dispenser with the speed of the guy who owns the record for eating the most hot dogs.

We all have our skills.

Jeff Rossen is TODAY's National Investigative Correspondent, and yes, he really is obsessed with napkins.

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