February 9th is National Bagels and Lox Day.
At the heart of this day, well, there's a hole. But at the metaphoric heart of this day, we celebrate the melding of Jewish and American tradition through cured fish as an unusual but beloved breakfast item. The best (and only?) way to honor this holiday is by telling corny jokes and noshing on the best lox around.
Fresh out of corny jokes? This oughta get you started: How'd the Jewish prisoner break out of jail? He was used to eating lox.*
*Compliments of Jewish dads everywhere.