President Bush's Remarks During Dedication to Utterly Necessary Monument to Noble Red Scare Hysteria

Published: June 12, 2007, 6:09 pm

Tags: 2007

THE PRESIDENT: Today, having spent over six years proactively mortgaging America to Communist China, I am awful thankful to be totally deaf to that smartypants "irony" stuff, so that I can dedicate this here "Victims of Communism" memorial without totally busting a gut. It makes me feel all warm-gloopy inside to be unveiling Washington's most nakedly political, Neocon-flavored monument. (Applause.) In fact, come to think of it, me and Condi couldn't have asked for a more perfect icing on the diplomatic "fuck you" cake we've been baking to kick off the new cold war with Russia. (Applause.) Yes, I'm real grateful to be here. With the public no longer getting ascared every time I yap about terrorists, it's nice to talk about a boogeyman from another era – the commies. Now there was an enemy! They were everywhere – in Hollywood, in the schools, in Congress. So intense was America's fear of that lurking, mysterious menace, we fought and lost not one, but TWO totally

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