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Title: Two Girls, One Very Large Oreo View count: 49 Rating: 0 (0 ratings) Description: When one recalls the word epic, Beowulf, Odysseus, Macbeth, Hercules, and other such masculine, brave, heroic, and for the most part, fictional characters come to mind. Tonight, however, I both witnessed and experienced an epic event that is not masculine or fictional, but is indeed brave and heroic. As I sat peacefully in my dormatory, I was startled by my dear friend and roommate awakening me to behold a sight whose magnificence was so...magnificent, that I would ever be in such awe for the rest of my days. There, only feet from my trembling body, was an oreo...but not just any oreo. It was a 24 layered oreo...my roommate had created a monster. I screamed with horror as she lifted this beast to her salivating mouth. I bounded across the room and grabbed her arm saying, "Jane Embry, spare yourself! Think of the calories!" But, alas, it was too late. She had gaped her mouth wide and sunk her teeth into the monstrosity. She did not survive. And God raised his mighty hands to sky and said, "We shalt remembereth this day forevermore. For this be-eth the day that Jane Embry Watts was cruelly taken before her time. Let this be an exampleth for all of thee! If thou should giveth into Hell's temptation in the image of calories, thou shalt choketh and die on thine vomit. Amen." Tags: big, oreo, epic, college, roommates, Author: KETchannel |
