TODAY | April 15, 2014
>>> tabatha coffey does not hold back when it comes to helping struggling business owners on the hit bravo show "tabatha takes over."
>> i'm taking over . that comb is filthy. whose is this? all you have to do is open your mind and listen to me. you shouldn't put bleach over the top of hair color .
>> i know that's the, you know, rule, but rules are made to be broken.
>> give me the keys. i'm taking over here. you're bloody useless. i'm not kidding. give them to me.
>> she's not kidding. and now tabatha wants you to be the boss of your life at home and in the workplace in her new book "own it." tabatha is with us. good to see you. you're a lovely person, but when you tell people the truth, you don't hold back. and this is a part of the concept of owning it. what does that mean?
>> you know what? i don't think enough people take responsibility for their lives or their work. so everyone likes to sit back and say oh, i wish i had this, or i wish i was here in my career, or i wish i could do this. but they don't sit back and really take a look at it and take charge and really own what they need to do to make the changes.
>> so where does this toughness come from that we see on the show? we know you're a sweetheart underneath it all. it's all for show. where does it come from? because you talk about your mother and you have norma's notes throughout the book. what did she mean to you and to who you are today?
>> oh, everything. i mean, she was my mother, so she formed everything. she was pretty much a single parent. my father left when he was very young and she was tough. my mother believed in giving praise that was earned. you had to earn it. you had to work for it. it wasn't just praise for the sake of praise. and that made me as an individual work a lot harder, and she was a tough businesswoman. she ran very successful businesses and she was very tough the way she ran them.
>> but it was tough love.
>> it was tough love. it was always done to make people better. to protect her business. to do the right thing, you know, for her family and to take care of people. it was never done in a mean or gratuitous way.
>> i want to get to one point you make. you say one of the threads for changing it is change. you say not all changes are under your control, but how you handle them is. how do you apply that to business?
>> you need to be like bamboo. you need to be able to sway with the breeze and be adaptable, because we can't count on everything staying the same all the time. change will happen. it needs to happen. it's part of life. but you need to be adaptable to it, and so many people are so rigid that they get so freaked out by the unknown that they become paralyzed.
>> you say see change as an opportunity, not as an obstacle. how do you do that?
>> you need to sit back and say here's what's happened, i've been given a. now i need to go to d. what are the steps i'm going to take? instead of sitting there and being paralyzed by that fear and not being able to move, you need to look at what it's opened up. sometimes change opens up a whole new way of life for you that you never thought of going down that avenue before and it really makes for huge success.
>> along those lines, you say successful people adapt fast to change. you've got to move.
>> you have to move. you can't sit there and kind of woe is me, what am i going to do, i don't know what to do, you need to figure it out while you're moving forward so you can keep being successful.
>> it's amazing advice. quickly, at what age did you feel you owned it?
>> i still feel like i'm owning it. i think that's process every day. i think that's the great part of what being a person is and growing older and being a business owner is, you need to keep adapting, keep working towards change and keep moving forward.
>> tabatha, great advice. thank you so much.
>> see, she's not so scary. we're okay.
>> i love her. the book is called "own it" and we're back in a moment.