TODAY

TODAY   |  October 09, 2013

Body language mistakes you’re probably making

If you’re eyeing that next promotion or looking to really connect with someone, you may be giving off bad signs that you aren’t even aware of. Body language expert Janine Driver shares some tips on how to make the right impression in business and in your personal life.

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This content comes from Closed Captioning that was broadcast along with this program.

>> with your boss or you and your spouse are having trouble in the romance department it could be because of your body language .

>> stieps we send off negative messages and we don't know it. we brought her in to point out our mistakes. she is the president of the body language institute.

>> nice to see you guys.

>> can you change professional success by changing your body language ?

>> you can. you can increase your wins in the game of life up to 50% more. more dates, more communication with your kids. get the job wyou want and land the man you want. whatever you're looking for.

>> we'll start in the work place. what's the belly rule.

>> the belly button rule is we face our belly button toward people we like, admire and trust. so if i'm talking to you in a meeting or i shake your hand like this i'm giving you literally the cold shoulder .

>> you're protecting your belly button . i'm saying i want out of here.

>> square up to the person.

>> square up. pay attention. i call this navel intelligence.

>> get it?

>> your boss is nearby, how do you position yourself to get that respect and repore with your boss.

>> we make a lot of mistakes. i sit opposite the desk. this is increasing your stress and my stress. this is a fighting pose when you stay here a long time. what are you going to do about it.

>> wow.

>> so what i want to do is once we sit down i want to be slightly off center. if you're in a job interview or talking to your boss, move your chair slightly off center.

>> what about the belly button ?

>> if we have an invisible beam as long as they intersect we're good but i'm not going to talk to you like this because they're not intersecting.

>> that's like in ghost busters . don't cross the beam.

>> we want to cross the beam.

>> tell me about nodding too often. i see this a lot.

>> you should nod -- the average is you should nod about every three to four sentences but if you're talking and i'm doing this this is like wrap it up. i see that. i'm a talker. so you're like this is the queue. faster, faster. three to four sentences. if you're nodding too quickly you're saying speed it up.

>> we go from work to home.

>> yes.

>> all right. now, tilting your chin up, what does that mean?

>> this is great if you're in politics and a leader but it comes across as i'm looking down my nose. this could be the kiss of delg for romance or communication.

>> what about kids?

>> even with kids. if you want to get lucky tilt your head to the right you look more attractive.

>> to the right.

>> and if you're already super attractive but a little on the dumb side you should be going left.

>> if you're dumb.

>> no, if you're attractive but stupid.

>> attractive but stupid. you want to go left. left looks more intelligence.

>> if you don't know your dumb always go for good-looking and go right.

>> you can go like this.

>> you can do this for the rest of the interview. it would be more enjoyable.

>> don't go left. you want to be level headed . she has a good head on her shoulders.

>> term i never heard before, steepling.

>> we see donald trump do this and business people . power, authority, and confidence but imagine when you're talking to your loved one, how is your day at work. this is i am the boss, you're so lucky to be married to me. the better move here is like blt, columbo would do this. you don't say how was your day, al. this right here is i'm judging you.

>> okay and then parenting.

>> parenting. this is my favorite. as a mom, i have an 8 week old baby charlie and 8-year-old son angus. we'll often talk to our kids like this, how was your day today. you're talking down to them. you're not going to get them to open up. the better move is even get to their level or below their level. if they're sitting on the couch literally sit down on the floor and say how was your day honey.

>> so you're looking up at them.

>> now they're less threatened and more apt to open up and share with you struggles they're going through. you can literally get them to cry as you talk to them.

>> belly button beams were way off.

>> al and i were good.

>> what about the evil sign. release the hounds smithers. jeanine,