TODAY   |  July 31, 2013

How rude! Dealing with bad beach behavior

Etiquette expert Diane Gottsman explains how you should go about dealing with unruly behavior you see at the beach, including people who play loud music and others who block large areas with tents.

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This content comes from Closed Captioning that was broadcast along with this program.

>>> all right. picture this, you go to the beach, lay your blanket out perfectly, close the eyes, enjoy the feel of the sun, sound of the ocean, when people walk by trampling sand all over your blanket.

>> or maybe you're lounging at the pool after a week of hard work and all you can hear is the loud cell phone conversation coming from the next chair. what do you do about this? today editor diane gotsman has the answers. you look like you do.

>> you do.

>> i'm on it.

>> what are the biggest problems people run into at the beach?

>> the big pet peeve is flicking sand, so don't wear flip-flops.

>> but the sand's so hot, though.

>> we're at the beach.

>> you're going to make us wear crocs?

>> crocs and a thong, not a good thing.

>> here's a photo from new jersey of a man, apparently, speaking loudly on his cell phone . when someone is talking on their cell phone loudly and you can tell by the picture that he is, what should you say to that guy?

>> first and foremost, you have to look how big he is, is he going to get mad at you and have a sand fight? pick your battles. but if you feel you really need to say something to him say, you know, preface it with we know you want to know we can hear your conversations. nice tone, polite, not adversarial.

>> what about music , if music is playing loud?

>> i like music .

>> i'm all for it.

>> what if someone doesn't like the music you play?

>> everyone likes my music .

>> except for me.

>> some music is going to happen, but if there's really loud and two teens offering your diet coke because they are friendly, you can tell them. if it's a mob and they are drinking all day, let it go. if you're at the pool and it's loud music , let the manager of the pool do it. you don't go and address the issue if you don't have to.

>> what if it's lyrics and you have your kids around and stuff.

>> i appreciate you enjoy this music , but we've got children and i would really appreciate you toning it down.

>> what about smokers? that's one of those things that can wreck the beach.

>> i'm so allergic to it. in italy, that was tough. everybody's still smoking.

>> what should you do?

>> you can say, you know, i'm allergic or my children are asthmatic, would you mind if you could just smoke in the other direction of the wind?

>> of course, those other people sitting down there.

>> irritate those people over there.

>> what about the people when they pick up their blanket because they are leaving and they snap it and all of it comes over and they are oblivious. what should you say to that person?

>> i hope since people are watching they are not going to do it, but if they snap it and they are gone, don't run after them. but if they keep doing it throughout the day, say you probably don't realize it, but all of that sand is coming on over to us, to our side.

>> either tons of selfish people in the world or truly ignorant is what we've established today.

>> how about this picture from long beach, long island. big tents.

>> they are great when you have a baby and stuff, but leave them further towards the back.

>> don't you hope that the wind just blows it completely away and takes care of the whole problem? unless it's a baby. the tent right on top of you, you want to try and catch them before they put that first stake in.

>> what about the people who sit so close to you, the beach is open, here's a good spot, they put a chair --

>> nothing around you but sand and they want to be close to hoda.

>> the best thing to do is pick up your chair and move over .

>> what if he follows you? now you have a stalker and call the cops.

>> then that's a different story.

>> all right. thank you.