TODAY

TODAY   |  July 04, 2013

Hoda: Hey men, Speedos are 'not at all attractive'

TODAY's Kathie Lee and Hoda don red, white and blue in honor of Independence Day, chat about some of the hot topics of the day – including what’s appropriate to wear to the beach – and compete in a Fourth of July quiz.

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This content comes from Closed Captioning that was broadcast along with this program.

>> it's the fourth of july. we had to have the appropriate drink.

>> of course.

>> this is pink sangria.

>> does that go over your head? try your hat on.

>> it fits perfectly.

>> perfectly.

>> these are great hats.

>> actually, this is --

>> i like it. let me see yours.

>> you look like betsy ross .

>> i hear she was hot.

>> all right. so we are drinking a pink sangria.

>> we are?

>> yes.

>> let's taste it.

>> we like.

>> we have a cocktail segment coming up.

>> yes, we do.

>> here's something according to trip adviser.com. a lot of people will be heading out of town, traveling for the fourth of july. some are going to the beach. so the question is dwhoorkts you think is appropriate wear for the beach when you hit the beach? 34% said it is inappropriate for men to wear speedos.

>> is that a thong?

>> yes, it's like a thong.

>> i find them not at all attractive. at all.

>> do you?

>> i wish i could tell the whole joke but there's a funny joke about a guy that goes to europe and he puts on his speedo and walks all around and nobody -- nobody -- he gets no attention from the women at all. finally he sees an old fisherman and he goes, sir, you need to go to the marketplace. french accent . you need to go to the marketplace and put a potato in your speedo .

>> he goes, oh, okay. so he goes and puts a potato in his speedo and people start laughing at him. start laughing at him and just making fun of him and the whole thing. and he goes, i did. he said you need to put the potato in the front.

>> that's good.

>> he was carrying a load down that beach.

>> 25% --

>> i love that joke.

>> 25% say that skimpy bikinis are --

>> thinking about that potato, aren't you?

>> people feel the most comfortable in their bodies.

>> look at that.

>> let's just live here for one second.

>> how old were you?

>> i think i was 32 then.

>> you were 32.

>> had you had your kids or not yet?

>> no, no, no. that's right before frank and i got married. when i weighed 104.

>> i never weighed 104, honestly.

>> at birth.

>> well --

>> too funny.

>> i remember in sixth grade when i weighed 101. i remember the feeling of standing on the scale and going oh, my god, that feeling was so awful because everyone was like, i'm 88, i'm 90.

>> but you were much taller than everyone.

>> not really.

>> and you were egyptian.

>> what does that have to do with anything?

>> you are a sun goddess . tall and lean.

>> most people are the most confident in their bodies, a bikini body, when they reach their 50s. that's the age at which you are most confident.

>> 59, that's what i automatic.

>> would you go out in a bikini?

>> not in a pig's -- never! i will never again look like i did in that other.

>> why do you care?

>> i care. there's satellites in the sky. i'm terrified of that thing that they have celebrity bodies gone bad. you know? they take a picture of you some place and then they send it to whatever magazine does it and then they show it and you are humiliated.

>> i get very, very, very embarrassed in the gym because just lately a lot of people have been working out a lot and when they get ready in the gym, they put a towel on the floor. they are in their underwear and bra. they are this thin and they put on their whole makeup. they do all their hair while they are in there. but that's how they do it. like people are walking around and it's -- i'm always like with a towel and i look like a crazy person.

>> you have a beautiful body. i've seen it. it's darn good.

>> you know what i mean ? it's a weird thing. can i say something else? i don't like those girls. i don't like them because i think they are too confident. i guess i don't --

>> we're running out of people that like our show. you offend everyone. those girls know you. now they don't like you either and we need 500 more people, don't we? we need the kids out there.

>> we need the college kids to tweet us. the college -- first of all, we love our college kids because you guys, we had no clue how many people were watching. we know you guys are awesome. we're probably a drinking game every time kathie lee says something.

>> now we want to exploit you if you don't mind at all. you might as well get used to it.

>> get on our twitter account.

>> we'd love that. then that puts us over 100,000. we've almost caught up to kim kardashian ?

>> not even close.

>> we have some guys with hot bads.

>> they're all right. i saw them. they're all greased up.

>> they are in the green room . they are slicked up. their chests -- it's raining men

>> they are from the land down under. they are like the chippendales of australia.

>> they are very cute. here's the thing. why are we having australians on on our birthday. they're not american.

>> because we are open and loving and we love all people.

>> they are greased up like that.

>> would you prefer that body or would you prefer another body who we have in our studio? this is something called the beer belly . we want to point out what this beer belly is. gerard is sporting a beer belly . can you show us a little bit of your underbelly.

>> that is full of beer. it can hold up to -- it's like a baby bjorn.

>> would you look at it? it can hold more than a six pack. but convenient. it's convenient, isn't it?

>> it's almost like recycling.

>> you look good. you wanted the show to get started because he was finishing up the beer. it can hold more than six beers. and it keeps it cold.

>> you have a hairy back?

>> no. hairy front.

>> hairy front. all right, that is one fine man. $30 for that.

>> we're going to play a little fourth of july trivia. sara is going to join us and quiz us.

>> lots of movies about the fourth of july. i'm going to ask you questions. you guess which one.

>> we're going to pop the popper. i don't know how we're going to do that.

>> which string, that one?

>> yes. you take that one.

>> or blow your horn. which oliver stone noon 89 epic --

>> which is it?

>> "fourth of july."

>> " born on the fourth of july ."

>> sorry.

>> wow. wow. didn't get through that question.

>> hold on. here is another one. tom cruise . which 1975 hit thriller directed by steven spielberg featured a town preparing for a fourth of july celebration while always --

>> "jaws."

>> kathie lee ?

>> which 1996 sci-fi block buster turned will smith into a bona fide movie star --

>> what?

>> premature poppage. that was not -- you don't know the answer.

>> which film featured a boxer preparing to fight his nemesis --

>> the one with russell crowe .

>> no.

>> rocky --

>> and we have a clear winner. kathie lee has taken this.

>> continue. i like this game.

>> one more?

>> tiebreaker.

>> this will break the tie even though it's 4-0. which broadway show was adopted into a 1972 --

>> 1776 .

>> and kathie lee will take the title.

>> yea.

>> thanks, dear. i want to see you model that thing. that beer thing, baby, all right?

>> it's time for --

>> in a speedo . oh, yeah. i'm sorry.

>> it's time for our --

>> this is a slow and easy summer song . i love the swann brothers so much on the "voice." this is a great -- an old song they covered called " drift away ."

>> am i going to like this one?

>> you're going to love it. oh, give me the beat boy free my soul i wanna get lost in your rock 'n' roll and drift away give me the beat boy free my soul i wanna get lost in your rock 'n' roll and drift away

>> i vote it's not as much fun when i like the song.

>> i liked when we did a little john and low last week.

>> that was the worst piece of crap i've ever heard in my life.

>>> is it okay or not okay to post minor annoyances on twitter? that was a question "ok" magazine asked us. here's what we said.

>> i think people are confused about what is actually interesting to other people, don't you think?

>> well, you might be right on that. here's my answer. yes it is okay. anybody can post whatever they want no matter how annoying. here's the good news. you don't have to read it.

>> but you look so self of absorbed and so self-centered.

>> stop reading other people's tweets.

>> i don't.

>> who are those women?

>> i don't know.

>> who thought it was a good idea to give them a tv show ?