TODAY

TODAY   |  May 20, 2013

Kathie Lee, Hoda show off their coconuts

While the rest of the TODAY anchors are in Hawaii for the show, Kathie Lee Gifford and Hoda Kotb joke that they got left behind because they’re troublemakers on the road and show off their coconuts.

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This content comes from Closed Captioning that was broadcast along with this program.

>> all we have to say is -- thank you.

>> and happy birthday to cher, she's 67 years old today.

>> she's had her coconuts done a few times, that's why those coconuts still look darn, darn good.

>> in mine in reality are way down here.

>> i'm just sipping and that's where mine are, that's sad. i'm doing it because the rest of the today show , we're the only ones left behind .

>> why?

>> because it would be nothing but trouble if we went on the road. they wanted to minimize the things that could go wrong, so they left the two things that could go wrong, at home. fine.

>> this is called a lava flow . it's got, it's half pina colada and half strawberry daiquiri .

>> i don't think you can have it, hoda?

>> what's in a pina colada .

>> who cares.

>> hoda, you can't be doing that. because your dog's already got the runs. you don't need it, too.

>> for four days. can i tell you something? it's really gross and sad.

>> it's motherhood, get over it.

>> gosh, that's delicious.

>> it's fantastic.

>> so back to blake and his stomach issues. he was eating the food i've been eating him, and he must have eaten the junk off the street. i grab it, i try to get it out, he bites me, my hands are in his mouth. he got really sick. so not really sick, he just has diarrhea. and it's not great walking your dog in the rain. because --

>> with diarrhea.

>> and it rained all weekend. and i'm telling him to go.

>> very hard to clean up, which your neighbors appreciate.

>> i'm giving him some stuff and someone said put a little quarter of pepcid ac into his food.

>> i know it's white rice and chicken. as long as he still has an appetite, you're good.

>> how was your weekend? you know how mine was.

>> my weekend was great, my son came home for a while, i'm so excited to see him. the trouble was when we went -- we picked up some chinese food last night in our neighborhood. not my favorite place, his favorite place. because mom's general tsao chicken is so much better. so i had a taste of it, cold noodles, which i don't like. i like my noodles the way i like my men -- hot. so i was fine, i go to bed early, sleeping, tired. and all the allergies and everything that are happening. and 11:00 last night i wake up, i had msg poisoning. i know. it was -- have you guys ever had. frank was fine. cody was fine. but joanne, do you mind? joanne, do you mind? because it's cher's birthday does not mean that --

>> we're fine with that, i'm sure it's important.

>> i'm telling you, i thought i was going to die. what's it called when you get that --

>> anaphylactic, when your throat closes up, your nose closes up. you think you can't get air to breathe. and i'm still, i'm on benadryl.

>> but you feel better than last night.

>> i thought they outlawed msg.

>> maybe you're allergic to something else, maybe it's cody.

>> good news if you live in florida.

>> zepher hills florida, 30 miles outside ever tampa. somebody walked into a publix, bought a ticket and now is a zillionaire.

>> the highest jackpot in history, $550 million.

>> i guess after taxes, it's only $23 million.

>> i didn't realize it's not after taxes. a smart man said that's just what the lottery gets, and on the 360, you pay taxes. i never heard that before. and peter knows it. our photographer, who knows really nothing at all is saying yes. so -- he knows how to take a statistics, let's be honest.

>> let's talk about the billboard awards last night. if you watched --

>> that was cruel.

>> it's true. peter knows that.

>> if you watched the billboard awards last night, you got quite a show. first of all, there were bells and whistles and fireworks and taylor swift won all the awards, it was great. and then there were the moments that stood out.

>> there always are.

>> madonna received the award for top touring artist and she wasn't wearing pants in her acceptance speech.

>> when does she wear pants.

>> let's watch and hear a little of the her speech.

>> it took longer to negotiate whether i could show my [ bleep ] in that trailer, than it did to rehearse for my tour. a lot of [ bleep ] negotiations. anyway, they obviously think i'm shorter than i am and i'm not happy about that. they say, thank you, will, by the way.

>> and i'll also take off my pretentious sunglasses. it's good that i have will here to hold all my props, thanks.

>> wow.

>> you can see a little bit of that speech.

>> that was interesting.

>> she seems so grateful.

>> you know -- when you've been blessed enough to be at her age, the number one touring -- still in the country, still kicking it, still, you know, i don't go to madonna concerts she not my cup of tea . she's no paul anka . who is on our show today. she should, of all people, be extraordinarily grateful and she doesn't seem grateful at all.

>> it was an unusual speech. by the way, there were great performances, we should point out. bruno mars killed it.

>> i'm sorry.

>> he's so talented.

>> i love bruno mars, he's great. we didn't get to see them then.

>> hold on.

>> some people were saying a lot of the artists were lip-syncing at the billboard music awards .

>> stop it!

>> yes.

>> what's your favorite thing, this monday.

>> besides you, hoda-woman?

>> yes.

>> i've got two. first of all, one of my favorite people in the whoeld world is david friedman , who wrote "scandalous" with me, along with david pomerance. he also does "everyone has a story" these cds are available at amazon.com. if you love his music, you're going to love these. i was going to use this as my favorite thing, hoda, but i didn't realize, they're a little pricey. but part of the proceeds go to -- charity water. it's called.

>> a great organization.

>> this is called ciao beachwear. they're really adorable.

>> how much they?

>> they're $225. they're a little pricey. but part goes to charity.

>> this is the cure-all to everything you ever need.

>> even a broken heart?

>> everything.

>> chapped lips, aquafor. your face is peeling. you have a scar? this stuff --

>> it's better, it's better than anything. aquaphor.

>> available at local drug stores .

>> hey, sara.

>> my favorite things is hot men everywhere. the third ivillage hot dads contest. you have until may 27th at klgandhoda.com. a bunch of categories, including facial hair, military dads, the prize is a week-long vacation for two, in the scrub island in the british virgin islands . make sure to submit your hot dads. the deadline is may 27th . the submissions are pouring in. so get in there.