Given that hats are no longer de rigueur in Western civilization, when the rare occasion for fancy headwear does present itself, why not go with a humanity-noshing sci-fi hat?
Princess Beatrice's apparent gambit, to wear a chapeau representing "a monster of vaguely anthropoid outline, but with an octopus-like head whose face was a mass of feelers, a scaly, rubbery-looking body, prodigious claws on hind and fore feet, and long, narrow wings behind" really paid off.
Before Wills and Kate had even shared their reluctant micro-kiss, Beatrice's Cthulhu hat already had acquired its own Facebook page with more than 5,000 fans. By 8 p.m. ET, it was closing in on 44,000 devotees.
This is no great surprise, considering the cosmic entity Cthulhu, originally depicted in H.P. Lovecraft's "The Call of Cthulhu," is worshiped by a worldwide doomsday cult.
Not since Aretha Franklin's Inauguration hat, with its 94,000 fans, has a headpiece enjoyed such popularity on the world's largest social network.
Currently, there are at least 14 Facebook pages dedicated to Beatrice's hat, with Princess Beatrice's ridiculous Royal Wedding hat the most popular.
Others whimsically-titled Beatrice's Hat Fan pages include:
- Beatrice's Amazing Hat.
- Beatrice's Pretzel Hat
- Beatrice's Hat - What is it and what can it be used for?
- The reindeer at Will & Kate's wedding LOL JK it was just Beatrice's hat
- Princess Beatrice of York One Of A Kind Rocked Her Hat
- Princess Beatrice looks like an antelope in that hat
- Beatrice's Hat what the hell was that?
Arguably unflattering comments on the most popular fan page stated that the hat, paired with Taylor Momsen makeup, seems more appropriate for Lady Gaga, rather than the daughter of Prince Andrew and Sarah Ferguson. Other notable comments observed:
"Perfect example of why it is bad to always be surrounded by toadies who assure you 'oh, my you look fabulous!'"
"She needs that hat to stay in contact with the mother ship."
"...it looks like someone's tied a bit of ribbon around a giant anus."
Such commenters may pay for their insolence. Beatrice's hat does, after all, represent the priest of "the Great Old Ones who lived ages before there were any men, and who came to the young world out of the sky."
Cthulhu hat tip to Nerdier-than-thou Ree Hines of the Clicker
More royal wedding ridiculousness:
- The Windsor Knot: Live royal wedding updates
- Royal wedding rules Twitter
- Kate Middleton kicked off Facebook ... again!
Helen A.S. Popkin knows better than to mess with the Old Ones. Join her cult on Twitter and Facebook.