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Jon Gosselin claims Kate has a million dollars

Sun rises in the east, bear goes in woods, Jon and Kate Gosselin live to fight another day. And so is the new (sad) world order.

In this edition of “what you missed while you were having a good weekend not thinking about Jon and Kate plus their ever-burgeoning hate,” Jon Gosselin thinks estranged wife Kate has plenty of money to pay bills — a million dollars in fact.

Last week, Kate’s attorneys said Jon violated an arbitration agreement when he allegedly all but emptied the couple's joint bank account. Papers filed by Jon’s attorneys essentially serve as a counterclaim to those documents, stating: “It is specifically denied that there are no other liquid funds in order to be utilized to repay the marital estate. To the contrary, Wife is in control of more than One Million Dollars ($1,000,000) of marital funds, which if necessary, could be utilized to fund the parties’ and family’s expenses.”

In other words, if there are bills to be paid, Jon says the money exists. The papers go on to say that Kate is failing to comply with accounting requirements set forth by arbitration.

One more note: if Kate doesn’t have a job, it’s not Jon’s fault, according to the papers.

“Husband specifically denies that he intentionally and unilaterally attempted to terminate both his and Wife’s employment,” the docs state. But since Kate's employment involves allowing her family to be filmed, it's unclear how Jon could explain the “no film crew” sign he posted in front of the family’s house.

‘This Is It,’ finallyCalling Michael Jackson’s tour “This Is It (For Now)” might have been a more apt choice for the singer’s final concert endeavor. At midnight Oct. 12, Jackson’s never-before-released single from the tour, which is also titled, “This Is It,” was made available for download on michaeljackson.com, a site run by Sony Music Entertainment.

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But that’s not all that’s coming from the slow drip that is the “This Is It” film faucet. A two-disc album, “Michael Jackson's This Is It” will drop in North America on Oct. 27 as a walk up to the “This Is It” theatrical release on Oct. 28.

According to the Web site, the backing vocals on the single are performed by Michael’s brothers, which the label collectively refers to as “The Jacksons.” But wouldn’t “The Jacksons” technically refer to the Jackson women, too? This moniker seems disingenuous, especially if the Jackson men are going to profit from sales of the single when the most commercially successful surviving sibling — Janet — isn’t part of the effort.

Taste in film ‘Retreats,’ wins box officeIf “Beverly Hills Chihuahua” wasn’t proof enough that a movie doesn’t have to be good to make big money at the box office, then please turn your attention to this weekend’s No. 1, “Couples Retreat.”

The film raked in $35.3 million, and offers a lesson in moviegoing: add one beautiful location to a comedy that is not very funny, add to it actors who aren’t really very famous, and you can make a movie that opens to reviews that aren’t very good, yet still make cash hand over fist.

The other talker from the weekend is “Paranormal Activity.” The ultra-low-budget horror film has it’s third weekend in theaters, played to only 160 theaters, and still took in $44,162 per theater for a $7.1 million gross.

Courtney Hazlett delivers the Scoop Monday through Friday on msnbc.com. Follow Scoop on Twitter @courtneyatmsnbc

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