And now for some of the most dashing, heroic, inspiring figures ever to grace the big and small screens alike.
April Fools! In honor of the first and funniest day of the new month, we've compiled some of the greatest knuckleheads, simpletons and simpleminded geniuses from our favorite TV shows and films. Look at it this way: No matter how badly you got pranked today, you’ll never sink (or rise?) to the level of these nitwits. Read on:
George Costanza, "Seinfeld"
Georgie-boy, the neurotic, dishonest, stingy, narcissistic and insecure scene-stealer on "Seinfeld" is arguably the greatest sitcom character of all time -- and the biggest fool. "Let's face it, I've always been handicapped -- I'm just now getting the recognition for it," he told Jerry about reaping the benefits of a disabled person (including a private bathroom stall and riding a chair lift upstairs to the tune of "My Baby Takes the Morning Train"). And although he knocked down half the kids at a birthday party (plus a senior citizen) to escape a fire, the unabashed "double dipper" did chalk up one good deed: saving a beached whale. (But only because he lied to his girlfriend about being a marine biologist.) George's antics, which could fill a giant tome (that he'd only read in the bookstore bathroom), can be distilled in a single word: Moops.-- Dru Moorhouse
Lucy Ricardo, “I Love Lucy”
Lucy Ricardo could always be counted on to come up with a hairbrained scheme to get what she wanted (usually to get cast in husband Ricky's nightclub show!) Ricky never knew what kind of crazy plan the loveable redhead would come up with next, from dressing up as a Martian to donning a showgirl costume to sneak into the act, to scaling the wall of her favorite actor’s house to snag a grapefruit to add to her “Celebrity Fruit” collection. While Lucy was great at coming up with big ideas, she wasn’t exactly stellar at executing her plans, which often ended up causing trouble for her and everyone around her. Lucy certainly wasn’t the brightest woman, possessing a child-like naivete that could be both endearing and frustrating to her husband and neighbors The Mertzes. But no matter how much trouble she caused, no one could stay mad at Lucy for long. -- Ashley Majeski
Barney Fife, "The Andy Griffith Show"
If "The Andy Griffith Show" established one thing, it was that the seemingly tranquil, definitely fictional town of Mayberry was chock-full of fools -- well-meaning, hijinks-prone, hilarious fools. There was Goober, Gomer, Floyd, Otis, Ernest T. Bass (and all his kinfolk) and more. But the star fool was bumbling lawman Barney Fife. If you asked him to describe himself, he'd say he was an expert marksman (though he carried just one bullet, and Andy made sure even that one stayed in his pocket), a smooth-talking ladies' man (though beleaguered love Thelma Lou might disagree) and of course, an all-round scholar. Heck, he might just be inclined to sing a little ditty about his greatness. But in truth, the merits he boasted about were either overestimated or completely fabricated. His best quality was the one that he never mentioned, but often demonstrated -- his loyalty to Andy and the rest of the town. -- Ree Hines
Randy Hickey, “My Name Is Earl”
I still miss the Hickey brothers, Earl and Randy, from “My Name Is Earl,” which ran from 2005 to 2009. Earl was kinda dumb, but little brother Randy was really, gloriously, wonderfully idiotic. He thought E.T. was a monkey. Believed the War of 1812 was a war the U.S. won by the score of 18 to 12. Tried to plug a television into a dog. As a prison guard, he let the convicts go out for ice cream. Randy once told Earl, “If Dad was mayor, we'd get to wear top hats and sashes and judge beauty contests.” “That’s Monopoly, Randy,” Earl retorted. Like his big brother, Randy had a good heart and was gentle as a lamb, but his stupidity could get annoying. Once, when he was pestering sister-in-law Joy for a story, she snarled, “Here’s a story. Once upon a time Randy shut up. The end. Had a slow start but I liked the middle.” -- Gael Fashingbauer Cooper
Chauncey “Chance” Gardiner, “Being There”
As the ultimate oblivious wise man in the 1979 film, Chance was a simple-minded, cloistered gardener thrust into the real world after his wealthy benefactor died. Thanks to a lot of assumptions by a U.S. Presidential adviser who nearly ran him over, Chance became “Chauncey Gardiner,” whose simple statements of fact and observation (and usually garden-themed) were taken as deep, Buddha-like wisdom. Everyone heard what they want to hear and imbued Chance’s words with their own expectations, which made them seem far more foolish than he was. After all, Chance only wanted to watch more TV. “Life,” as he said toward the end, quoting the adviser, “is a state of mind.” Chance’s state of mind was as placid as a lake. -- Randee Dawn
Steve Martin, "The Jerk"
Martin’s romp through the classic 1979 comedy is driven by the foolish antics born out the comedian’s wildly popular stand-up act of the 1970s. Anyone who ever cracked up at the Martin’s “wild and crazy guy” routine should be a fan of Navin R. Johnson’s rags-to-riches story. The whole film is a series of nincompoop discoveries for Navin, a man who gets overly excited by discovering his name in the new phone book and overly agitated by the prospect of illicit cat juggling. As the trailer says, “He proved himself an inspiration to jerks everywhere.” – Kurt Schlosser
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