By Liane Bonin of HitFix.com
I am so glad it’s time for another edition of “Top Chef,” because I’ve had the “Beef Tongue” song on a loop in my head for the last seven days and I’m hoping this episode will force it out once and for all. As long as it isn’t replaced by Fabio repeating the word “hambooger” over and over again, I’ll be happy.
Dale wants to make it clear: he isn’t like one of those New School parents who think losing’s okay. We’re not all winners! Yes! He’s so Tiger Mother and doesn’t even know it!
Padma starts rhyming and Dale thinks she’s speaking in tongues, but really, she’s just talking to the chefs like they’re children. Which isn’t a bad thing in this case, because they’re going to Sesame Street! Actually, a few inhabitants of Sesame Street are coming to the show. Cookie Monster, Elmo and some purple thing called Telly will be judging the Quickfire Challenge. So, the chefs must make a cookie, because I’m guessing Cookie Monster no like foo-foo dining. He like cookie! The furry ones do have a few diva requests, though. Elmo wants a cookie with zucchini and carrots. Elmo needs a good, hard smack. Cookie Monster wants chocolate chips. Cookie Monster rocks. The chefs are sent on their way and Padma actually starts chatting up the puppets. But they’re not interested in no nicey-nice chit-chat. The puppets heckle Dale. Cookie Monster eats the tablecloth. I think Cookie Monster and his pals should judge every Quickfire, because they’re so much more fun than the usual stiffs.
Antonia’s cookies look sooo good. Not beautiful, but they appear to be in the “tastes really good” category. But I think the ooey gooeyness of them may have permanently stained some puppet mouth. Mike’s cookies look like something from a bake sale, which means not so great. Tiffany’s cookies look utterly dull. Shortbread is what you eat when you want lots of calories but not a lot of fun. I’m with Cookie Monster. Bring on the chocolate! And yet, Carla’s chocolate cookies look pretty uninspired. I know she makes cookies all the time for her catering business, but that’s no excuse to fall asleep at the wheel. Richard gets out the liquid nitrogen and makes cookie-shaped ice cream. Cookie Monster will not like!
And guess what? Cookie Monster pans Richard for not making an actual cookie, even though it has Elmo’s requested zucchini in it (ugh). Cookie Monster knows his cookies! He also declares Angelo’s cookie dry. But he liked Dale’s sweet-salty potato chip and chocolate cookie and Antonia’s chewy, gooey cookie. Though Elmo thought Antonia’s cookies looked like cow poo. I think it’s time to throw Elmo into the Cuisinart. The little creep doesn’t appreciate a good cookie (Carrots? Zucchini? It’s not a friggin’ muffin, you weirdo), he’s got an attitude. The winner is… Dale.