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Janese Pfeiffer and Hudson Valley Photography
Janese Pfeiffer "borrowed" the idea of matching her groomsmen's socks (below) from a friend whose wedding party boys (above) did the same.
By
TODAY contributor
updated 5/12/2011 4:30:46 PM ET 2011-05-12T20:30:46

Wedding poaching is a growing trend for the busy, rushed or uninspired. Call them copycats or call them resourceful, but for cut-and-paste couples, another wedding’s details may be just the thing they’ve always wanted to make theirs special, too.

A decade ago, wedding poaching was much more difficult — and much more obvious. Brides bought their dresses at local boutiques, not online. Wedding albums resided on parents’ coffee tables, not on Facebook. Florists, photographers, performers and vendors relied on word of mouth rather than recommendations on wedding blogs. 

Slideshow: Chic summer bridal gowns (on this page)

And as national retailers from J. Crew to  David’s Bridal and Ann Taylor are streamlining options and making beautiful gowns (without a six-month delivery time), it’s only natural that women are making those choices over and over. 

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Then there’s budgetary explanation, as some brides are opting to save money by renting or borrowing used gowns.

Slideshow: Best-dressed celebrity brides

Take Amelia Nardinelli, the California bride who passed her dress on to two friends after her own 2004 nuptials. The New York Post reports that Nardinelli loaned out the dress partly because of her friends’ budget concerns, and partly because, well, she liked the idea of sharing something so special with other women in her life.

“It’s the most meaningful and memorable piece of clothing I’ll ever wear, and to share it with such close friends is an honor,” she told the paper.

Story: Short wedding dresses make the bridal cut

And that’s the thing about wedding poaching: It’s so pervasive that today’s brides don’t actually mind their friends’ copycatting. Even when it comes to highly personal weddings, imitation remains the sincerest form of flattery.

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“I think I’m a copycat!” admitted unapologetic poacher Aimee Bois, who confessed to copying “a lot of ideas from friends and co-workers” for her July wedding, including using the same vases and “pretty much the same flower arrangements as my friend.” 

The human resources consultant, 31, who lives in Beverly, Mass., explained that the volume of weddings she’s attended has turned her into a connoisseur, and so feels her expertise justifies her party pilfering. “I’ve been to 35-plus weddings,” she reasoned. “And I’ve witnessed a lot of ideas to steal.”

Story: On 100th birthday, he married the woman of his dreams

Janese Pfeiffer, 32, “stole” one particular idea from a friend of a friend for her summer wedding last year. She saw an acquaintance’s early summer wedding photos on Facebook wherein the groomsmen all donned the same striped purple socks. She adopted the idea just in time for her late summer wedding — but in green. When apprised of the poach, the original bride wasn’t angry — she was flattered. 

“Girls are more prone to share, and with sharing comes the risk of copying,” says Anja Winikka, senior editor at wedding site TheKnot.com.

Story: Knotty problem: Whether to wed midweek

Recently, when a woman posted on The Knot’s message board her frustration over a friend’s buying a similar wedding dress, reactive reader comments were mixed. While some said she should be flattered, “others told her to suck it up — that everyone was wearing fit and flare dresses because that’s the trend,” said Winikka.  

Her advice for brides feeling the copycat burn? Just chill.

Story: Hey, that’s my dress! Kate’s gown rings a bell

“At the end of the day, everyone wants their wedding to be unique and reflect their individuality,” said Winikka. “Just because you used the same Mason jars as her or she wore the same dress doesn’t mean you’re the same. You’re marrying different guys; you’re different people.”

© 2013 NBCNews.com  Reprints

Photos: Chic summer bridal gowns

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  1. Chic within your reach

    Boutiques are no longer the go-to stop for bridal gowns. These days, you can hit up your local mall – or even Costco – to find the wedding dress of your dreams.

    With fashion guidance from TODAY style editor and Bobbie.com’s Bobbie Thomas, take a look at gowns from mass-market retailers that are redefining the bridal industry market.

    Ann Taylor: Rose Petal Wedding Gown, $750
    Flirty florals are always eye-catching: Ann Taylor's silk rose petal wedding gown is covered in appliquéd petals for a mesmerizing effect.

    Bobbie Thomas' take: "This soft and fluttery style is great for a bride who wants to add a little curve to her shape." (Ann Taylor) Back to slideshow navigation
  2. Ann Taylor: Embroidered Tea Length Dress, $695

    Who says it has to be long? Ann Taylor's short, strapless dress features a full crinkle skirt for a play of textures and proportions.

    Bobbie Thomas' take: "A darling combination of sweet and girly – perfect for a day wedding." (Ann Taylor) Back to slideshow navigation
  3. BHLDN: Burnished Organza Gown, $1,400

    Take it up a notch with BHLDN's strapless bohemian gown, featuring sparkling bronze sequins at the top and five dramatic tiers of embroidered silk on the bottom.

    Bobbie Thomas' take: "Interesting details and elements make this gown perfect for the bride who wants something different." (BHLDN) Back to slideshow navigation
  4. BHLDN: Sweeping Tafetta Ball Gown, $1,600

    If you're looking for sophisticated drama, BHLDN's taffeta gown features a dramatically scooped neckline and a majestic A-line skirt. Not that it's without any whimsy: the dress also comes with handy side pockets.

    Bobbie Thomas' take: "For the belle of the ball, this grand gown makes a statement without looking over-the-top." (BHLDN) Back to slideshow navigation
  5. BHLDN: Greenbow Lace Gown, $600

    For the hippie in love, Tracy Reese's romantic crocheted lace dress comes dotted with globe buttons and encircled by grosgrain at the waist.

    Bobbie Thomas' take: "Vintage inspired with a romantic bohemian appeal, fantastic for a spring/summer outdoor affair or country wedding." (BHLDN) Back to slideshow navigation
  6. Kirstie Kelly for Costco: English Net & Alencon Lace, $999.99

    Yes, you can get your gown at Costco! While stocking up on a year's supply of toilet paper, you can also purchase this Kirstie Kelly Alencon lace trumpet gown with an elegant sweetheart neckline.

    Bobbie Thomas' take: "A great option with a universally flattering neckline and sophisticated details." (Kelly for Costco) Back to slideshow navigation
  7. Kirstie Kelly for Costco: Petal Lace Gown, $1,299.99

    For the romantic bride, Kirstie Kelly offers a petal lace trumpet gown with a subtle sweetheart neckline and cording hand sewn throughout the skirt.

    Bobbie Thomas' take: "This demure, feminine gown is perfect for a bride who is stylish yet conservative." (Kelly for Costco) Back to slideshow navigation
  8. David's Bridal: Oleg Cassini Gown, $850, with Bolero, $129

    Moments after Kate Middleton revealed her wedding gown, companies feverishly began emulating her classic look. David's Bridal re-creates the royal style – without the palace price tag – by pairing a strapless ball gown silhouette with a lace bolero.

    Bobbie Thomas' take: "Timeless and full of grace, this classic look is a chic option." (David’s Bridal) Back to slideshow navigation
  9. J. Crew: Starling Dress, $1,400

    J. Crew offers the perfect flirty option – a silk taffeta dress with festive ruffles, ostrich feathers and lace.

    Bobbie Thomas' take: "Sweet yet not too simple, this cocktail-length dress is fun, feminine and fabulous for a carefree setting." (J.Crew) Back to slideshow navigation
  10. J.Crew: Duchesse Satin Noelle Gown, $2,500

    Capture an old-world glamour with this vintage-inspired dress, complete with a traditional empire silhouette, dramatic bottom and three-quarter-length sleeves.

    Bobbie Thomas' take: "Consider this one conservative chic, a traditional gown fit for a queen." (J.Crew) Back to slideshow navigation
  11. J. Crew: Silk Chiffon Whitney Gown, $425

    Keep it casual with a flowy, strapless gown made of lightweight silk chiffon and boasting an eye-catching sash that falls down the center front.

    Bobbie Thomas' take: "Flowy, breezy and easy, this gown is ideal for a destination wedding." (J.Crew) Back to slideshow navigation
  12. White by Vera Wang for David's Bridal: Ball Gown with Fully Draped Skirt, $1,400

    For the modern princess, Vera Wang offers a princess-seam bodice and a flowy, breathtaking skirt.

    Bobbie Thomas' take: "Brides in search of the fairy-tale gown will appreciate this delicate yet dramatic gown." (Vera Wang for David’s Bridal) Back to slideshow navigation
  13. White by Vera Wang for David's Bridal: Gown with Hand Appliqued Lace, $800

    Vera Wang brings her golden touch to this unique lace gown featuring a romantic, asymmetrical pattern over soft, sensuous netting.

    Bobbie Thomas' take: "This understated yet whimsical design feels like a modern fantasy." (Vera Wang for David’s Bridal) Back to slideshow navigation
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    Above: Slideshow (13) Chic summer bridal gowns
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Video: Wedding gowns for every body

  1. Closed captioning of: Wedding gowns for every body

    >> way, josh groban is on the way. he's on 66th street. valentine's day is the big day for engagements, which means a lot of brides-to-be are now searching for that perfect wedding dress .

    >> she's the fashion editor for the knot.com, as in tying the knot.

    >> is kate middleton setting all kinds of trends? is that what's going on?

    >> we don't know too many details about kate's dress. the dress is actually being designed inside the walls of buckingham palace . so it's top secret .

    >> you have on a wedding dress , a little shortie.

    >> i'm getting married in september, so i thought i would get in on the action, and i'm wearing a little dress from priscilla of boston, and it's just a little cocktail dress . you can wear it to the reception or leaving the reception. so a lot of fun.

    >> beautiful.

    >> we're getting to the models. first we have allison who is peti petite, and show us the trend allison is showing off.

    >> allison is wearing a dress by ann taylor . the best part about this dress, $495.

    >> they can run up into the many thousands.

    >> you got it. they add a lot of fun and add a nice touch without a lot of bulk.

    >> you have to be careful about not being overwhelmed by the dress.

    >> right, something slim. next up, we have natalie, who is tall, and she's wearing a dress -- that is gorgeous.

    >> that doesn't scream wedding dress to me, but that is beautiful.

    >> this dress is a huge trend. this is from nordstrom and this dress is $558.

    >> it looks like it's $5,000 with all that beadwork.

    >> exactly. it's a plan the prohibition era trend which is huge because of the boardwalk empire.

    >> it's also like the great gatsby.

    >> good for a second marriage, perhaps.

    >> it's great for a destination.

    >> it is. thank you, natalie. i'm so excited about this next model. jen gotty, our manager.

    >> i didn't even know you were engaged. congratulations.

    >> this dress is from david's bridal. it's $640. again, another great price.

    >> go, gotty.

    >> it's not the huge ball gown , so we think it's kind of the kate middleton modern princess look. that's what we're calling it. a little bit of beading. it's great because the neckline minimizes her bust and the draped waist shows off her figure.

    >> it's so pretty in the back.

    >> that's beautiful.

    >> next step is our garden glam. we're seeing melissa who has a curvy figure. beautiful.

    >> melissa does have a curvy figure and she's showing it off. we always recommend that. if you've got it, flaunt it.

    >> because all eyes will be on you.

    >> it's $2,000, but it's got all the beadwork from the top of the shoulder neck line to the hem, so it's worth every penny.

    >> this is like the cinderella.

    >> come on out, christy.

    >> this is gorgeous.

    >> this is by vera wang , and this gown, believe it or not, $1,000 for all of this. we're playing up this whole ballerina thing. the pink bodice to the tulle

Explainer: 12 of the world’s wackiest weddings

  • Image: Newlyweds Batman and Wonder Woman, also known as Neil Vaughan and Sharon Wetherell
    Adam Gerrard  /  SWNS

    Your wedding day is supposed to be your day — one of the most pivotal days in your lives.

    Right?

    If that’s really true, then why not join the throngs of couples who are choosing to live out wild, fanciful or downright silly dreams in conjunction with their nuptials? Doing so could have a practical benefit: It could save you big bucks. In these recessionary times, many have been shunning lavish weddings and opting for unique ones instead.

    Here are 12 recent examples of utterly wacky — and utterly memorable — weddings. Click “next” at the left to start your (strange) trip down the aisle.

  • Holy matrimony, Batman!

    Image: Newlyweds Batman and Wonder Woman, also known as Neil Vaughan and Sharon Wetherell
    Adam Gerrard  /  SWNS

    For those of you out there who always sensed that Batman and Wonder Woman would make a great couple: It’s happened!

    On July 31, Sharon Wetherell and Neil Vaughan of Devon, England, tied the knot while all dressed up as their favorite superheroes. As “Wonder Woman” theme music blared, Wetherell, 40, made a grand entrance at the ceremony wearing blue hot pants, a red corset, flashy boots and a tiara and veil that cost her about $160. The groom’s face-obscuring Batman costume set him back about $290.

    The couple’s friends and family also got gussied up as superheroes. Iron Man, the Incredible Hulk, Robin, Poison Ivy, Lara Croft, the Joker, Bananaman and the Incredibles were all in attendance.

    “Our wedding was absolutely amazing and it cost us less than some couples would spend on just the dress,” Mrs. Vaughan said in the British newspaper The Daily Mail. “We were not allowed to see each other’s costumes before the big day, but when I did see Neil he looked fantastic as Batman. ... It was such a great day.”

  • No cold feet at T.J. Maxx wedding

    Image: Lisa Satayut and Drew Ellis at their T.J. Maxx wedding
    Bill Pugliano  /  AP for TJ Maxx

    Who doesn’t get excited about the prospect of bagging a bargain? Bride Lisa Satayut decided to combine that feeling with her excitement over bagging her beau.

    Explaining that T.J. Maxx is her “happy place,” Satayut married Drew Ellis in July in the size 8 shoe aisle of a T.J. Maxx store in Mt. Pleasant, Mich.

    The bride — a self-proclaimed “'Maxxinista” — wore a strapless white chiffon gown, with long black gloves and bright green gladiator-style sandals. A widened aisle, vine-covered arch and white chairs with red bows highlighted the traditional ceremony that included string music, display-dodging cameramen — and curious shoppers who stopped bargain hunting long enough to watch.

    Related video: With this bargain, I thee wed at T.J. Maxx

  • Happy ogre after

    Image: Vivian and Tracey Williams with dressed up wedding guests
    Wales News Service

    Tracey and Vivian Williams, a happy couple from Wales, tied the knot in May by dressing up as two of their favorite movie characters: the green ogres Shrek and Princess Fiona. Tracey Williams, 33, told the British newspaper The Daily Mail that the themed wedding idea suited her and her new husband perfectly.

    “Our friends always used to say we looked like the characters when we went on nights out,” she said. “Even though Shrek and Fiona are both green ogres, we didn’t take it offensively because we like them so much.”

    The couple actually saw a “Shrek” movie on their first date and have been loyal fans ever since. To get ready for the big day, the pair covered themselves in green body paint and affixed fake green ears to the tops of their heads. Tracey donned a bright red wig to complete the Princess Fiona look, and Vivian sported checked trousers.

    The Williams’ wedding guests got in on the fun, with the best man dressing up as Monsieur Hood, the bride’s father going as Lord Farquaad, the bride’s mother playing the Fairy Godmother and the maid of honor playing Snow White.

    Related story: Pair dress as Shrek, Fiona for wedding

  • Kiss the bride – if you can find her

    Image: Marvin Hunter and Kim Silver in a tree stand
    Mike Moynihan
    An Iowa couple whose passion for bowhunting encouraged Cupid's arrow to strike wore camouflage to blend in with the wooded backdrop at their treetop wedding.

    Kim Silver, 42, dressed in a silk gown made by camouflage specialists Mossy Oak, and her 61-year-old groom, Marvin Hunter, was dressed in camo shirt and pants at the June nuptials.

    They said their vows atop a tree stand hunting platform. The bride and groom occasionally punctuated the ceremony by firing arrows at targets. Hunter said the couple had always joked about getting married on a tree stand. Silver said the pair hunt together so much that the camo wedding "just seemed like the right thing to do."

  • A viral dance sensation

    Image: Wedding party dancing down the aisle
    TODAY

    Most couples wait until the reception before breaking out into the Funky Chicken on their wedding day, but Kevin Heinz and Jill Peterson figured, why wait to unleash their unbridled joy?

    The 28-year-olds floored their wedding guests by having their whole bridal party — including seven bridesmaids, five groomsmen and four ushers — boogie down the aisle in a choreographed dance more at home in a Broadway musical than in a somber church.

    Groomsmen split into sides as Heinz did a somersault in front of the wowed crowd — and the gown-clad Peterson quickly followed, shaking her hips to Chris Brown’s “Forever” while pumping her bridal bouquet into the air during the June 20, 2009, ceremony in St. Paul, Minn.

    The wedding party rehearsed the dance for just 90 minutes.

    Of course, some things are too good to keep to yourself. And when Kevin posted the wedding dance routine on YouTube, it quickly became a viral hit, with hundreds of thousands of people sharing in the couple’s novel way of showing their matrimonial joy.

    Related video: Wedding party boogies down the aisle

  • 110 bridesmaids set world record

    Image: Jill Stapleton with 110 bridesmaids
    TODAY

    Some people think five or six bridesmaids are a lot. But how about 110? Jill Stapleton, an Ohio gymnastics teacher, set a world record in June when she invited all of her young students to be her bridesmaids at her wedding.

    “We were actually going to go away for our wedding but this wedding day is more important to a lot of these little girls and boys back here that have made my dreams come true,” Stapleton said. “This is our dream wedding.”

    Stapleton married Chad Greenhill, a Marshall University cheerleader. The previous record was 90 bridesmaids.

  • An aisle of light bulbs, grills

    Image: Carolyn Weatherly and Audwin Mosby
    Courtesy Audwin Joaquin Mosby
    The bride wore white. The guests wore orange smocks.

    A Southern California couple wed in June in front of more than 100 guests at a Home Depot store where they work.

    The wedding party for 56-year-old Carolyn Weatherly and Audwin Mosby, who’s 55, marched down an aisle of light bulbs, grills and paint to the outdoor garden section.

    A wedding arbor and stage had been built from the store’s lumber and supplies.

    The bride said the store in Lake Forest is like a second home and her colleagues are like family.

    "I feel awesome," Mosby told the Orange County Register. "This is the best thing that has happened to me in a long, long time."

  • Sweet, sugary love

    Image: Jared and Jerri Guinther eating doughnuts at wedding
    Sara Terese Heise

    Voodoo Doughnut, a wildly popular indulgence with two locations in Portland, Ore., has an entire menu dedicated to wedding services. That menu includes a variety of matrimonial options, such as this “Legal Voodoo Wedding” package for $200: “Legal wedding ceremony, coffee & doughnuts for 24 people, 700-square-foot chapel, free parking & doughnut centerpiece.”

    The doughnut shops have married off more than 300 couples, sending hearts racing with both romance and sugar intake. Pictured here are Jared and Jerri Guinther enjoying their sweet nuptials.

  • Jaws of love

    Image: April Pignataro and Michael Curry in shark tank
    WNBC
    Talk about taking the plunge. April Pignataro and Michael Curry opted to be lowered in a steel cage into a shark tank to exchange their wedding vows in June.

    The bride wore a white wetsuit; the groom wore a black one. The experienced divers spoke their vows into radio headgear transmitted to a minister outside the tank while about 75 guests watched from behind glass. The 120,000-gallon tank at Atlantis Marine World in Riverhead, N.Y., includes sand tiger sharks, nurse sharks, moray eels and a massive Queensland grouper.

    Both Pignataro and Curry said the concept of a shark tank wedding thrilled them. “We both love the ocean, we love the water ... and yes, the idea of an underwater wedding, not to mention one surrounded by sharks at an aquarium, is different and unique, but that is also exactly who we are,” Pignataro told NBCNewYork.

  • 'I do' in Aisle 2

    Image: Jack Frankel and Fina Nikolos at wedding
    Mike Stocker  /  SunSentinel.com
    One couple decided to tie the knot where they first met: Whole Foods Market.

    Jack Frankel, 75, and 67-year-old Fina Nikolos met in May 2009 at the supermarket in Coral Springs, Fla. It had been raining when Frankel noticed a beautiful woman pass him. Nikolos offered to walk him to his car with an umbrella. He later thanked her by taking her out to lunch.

    In January 2010, the two returned to the place where their love began for a small wedding ceremony in the store's cafe. About 40 people attended the ceremony as store employees and customers watched and smiled. The couple held each other close during the ceremony, shedding a few tears. They also exchanged emotional vows. Nikolos was too overcome to finish hers aloud.

    According to the Fort Lauderdale Sun Sentinel, this was the first time customers wed in a Whole Foods Market in Florida, though employees have gotten married there.

    Frankel told reporters that the most irresistible thing about his bride is her eyes. “She looks at me with those Spanish eyes and I melt,” he said.

  • I now pronounce you bride and ghoul

    Image: Jack Holsinger and Connie Spitznagel
    Alicia Castelli  /  The Chronicle-Telegram

    Why don’t more bridal magazines suggest this as the perfect theme for an October wedding?

    In October 2009, Jack Holsinger, 61, and Connie Spitznagel, 44, dressed as pale-faced vampires for their Halloween-themed ceremony at a haunted house near Cleveland, Ohio. Holsinger arrived in a coffin inside a hearse, and the coffin was carried to the altar by six pallbearers. Minister Greg Kopp was dressed as Jason in the "Friday the 13th" movies. After the vows were exchanged, he ordered Holsinger not to kiss his new bride but instead to bite her on the neck.

    The couple vowed to love each other and haunt and howl at the moon together. Like typical mortal couples, the groom said he just wanted his bride to be happy.

    “This is her first wedding,” Holsinger said. “She had a common-law marriage the first time around, so she never really got a wedding. It’s what she wanted and it’s about her. It’s her time. Whatever she wanted.”

  • Will you Mario me?

    msnbc.com

    Proving that love is a game that two can play — a video game, that is — Bobbi VanZante and Elijah Slagter of Pella, Iowa, decided on a unique theme for their wedding: Super Mario Brothers. Slaget, the groom, will dress as Mario, of course, and VanZante will be costumed as the lovely Princess Peach.

    The father of the bride will be dressed up as Bowser, even though he’s the villain of the Mario universe. “It’s kind of part of the game,” VanZante explained to NBC’s Megan Reuther. “Bowser and all his buddies steal Princess Peach.” So who better to give the bride away to her groom?

    VanZante’s mother, Lori Mullen, was good-natured about the Mario madness, which included such details as making turtle shells out of bicycle helmets. “It fits both of them,” she said. “It’ll be a fun day and good remembrance.”

    Reached for comment inside a Nintendo gaming system, the real Mario commented: “It’s a-me, Mario!”

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