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Dance With The Devil

A wife is trapped in her husband's mysterious and secretive web, a world of deception and intrigue that would take her a decade to escape from — and almost cost her her life.
/ Source: Dateline NBC

Just because John Wayne supposedly played a character based on your father in the movies - a World War II admiral hero who whipped into shape the Fighting Seabees -it doesn't mean you have to follow in his daunting footsteps.

But John Perry –Admiral John Perry – did just that. A Navy man whose badges of honor earned him an enviable kind of all access backstage pass to life that made doors open, sitting presidents salute and certain women--one in particular--glow to simply be in his company.

Barbara Bentley would be swept away by John's ease and command. But she'd also be swept into the swirling tide of his mysterious and secretive life ... and a world of subterfuge and intrigue it would take her decades to surface from. 

Who could have guessed that Barbara's fate would change so utterly with a friend's invitation to drinks and dinner?

Barbara: A friend calls me at work and says, "Oh, could you do me a favor?  Could you do me a favor?  Could you come for the dinner party tonight?  I need a fourth for dinner."

Barbara was thirty-five and recently separated from her husband. She'd been on her own for more than a year in California's Bay Area, and was growing more comfortably into the routines of a single woman.

Barbara:  I had a good job.  I was going to school.

Dennis Murphy, Dateline NBC:  So, you were really taking care of yourself--

Barbara: Right, right.

Dennis Murphy: And your life was in shape.

Barbara: Right, thinkin' I'm a very independent woman.

So when her friend told her the other dinner guest would be a retired rear admiral from the Navy--even though Barbara was beat from analyzing samples at the chemical company lab where she worked--she decided to join her friend's dinner.  Her blind date introduced himself as John Perry. 

Dennis Murphy: So, what'd you think of this guy?

Barbara:  A lot of stories, I was fascinated by them.  He was very interesting. He said his father was Admiral Perry that started the Seabees in World War II, and that his great-grandfather on his mother's side was Admiral Perry that went to the North Pole. 

Perry dazzled Barbara and the other dinner guests with stories about being shot down in combat as a naval aviator....missions as a Navy Seal, flying with the Blue Angels, commanding the Swift Boats in Vietnam.

Barbara: So, here's this man with a lotta pedigrees, so to say.  And he was interested in me!

When the evening was over, John Perry walked her to her car.  Within weeks, they'd started dating ... after a few months, John moved in.   And as Barbara's new man blended into her social circle, he made quite the impression.

Donald: When he walked into the room, it's like everybody kind of stopped because you knew somebody had come in the door.

Toni: He had a charisma and a presence about him.

George: He came across as someone who knew what he was talking about.  He was very authoritative.

With such a special man beside her, Barbara's life became richer and more adventurous than she'd ever hoped for.  John Perry's work securing government contracts for clients often took him -- and now Barbara -- out of the country: to the Caribbean where they soaked up the sun, to Mexico City where they strolled the markets.  The distinguished retired officer was showing Barbara a new world, the good life of gourmet cuisine, vintage wines, fine art.  She was over the moon with it.

Toni: Here he comes along like he's Donald Trump.  You're going out to dinner, you're flying first-class.  I mean, anybody is going to be whisked off their feet. 

But--nagging problem, one getting worse--back in California the bills were piling up.  Their five-star lifestyle was being funded on plastic -- and John's commission checks for his consulting work only trickled in.  What's more, Barbara realized that her new companion wasn't just a big spender on the business trips. Fine crystal, rare whiskies, collectibles were everyday indulgences.

Barbara: I started to talk with him about it. "Well, you know, this isn't gonna do." And then he would get into his very defensive mode of, "Well, if you don't like it, I'll just pack my bags and leave." 

John's threats to split sent Barbara into a panic.  If he left, she'd have to shoulder their debt alone -- and admit she was a two-time loser in love. 

So she quickly smoothed things over with John just as he announced he'd come up with a plan to solve their money problems.  Barbara still owned half of a nice big house with a pool from her marriage.  Her ex was living in it temporarily, but John suggested they buy him out and move back in -- fix it up -- then put it back on the market for a tidy profit.

The mortgage payments would make their budget squeak, but in the end Barbara agreed.  The couple had barely unpacked their boxes when John Perry popped a cork -- and popped the question.

Dennis Murphy: How did you feel about becoming Mrs. Rear Admiral? 

Barbara: It had a nice ring to it.  (laugh) I was very, very proud to have him as my husband.

Barbara Bentley had told all her friends that someday her prince would come and he had, only he turned out to be a retired navy admiral and he was asking her to marry. 

Barbara: We talked about having maybe a church wedding at the base.  And having the swords crossed and walking out of the church under the swords.

But Barbara's fiancee, Rear Admiral John Perry, had another idea. He wanted to get married right away, down in Tijuana -- it would be cheaper, for one.  So Barbara changed mental scenery and envisioned a quaint Mexican chapel lit with candles but once they got down south-of-the-border she realized her groom had cooked up something else.

Barbara:  We start driving.  And all of a sudden now we're back into the poor part of town.  And pull up to this dilapidated storefront.  And it was a justice of the peace.

Dennis Murphy: What does the bride think about that?

Barbara: The bride was a little disappointed.  (laugh) You know, it was like, oh, my god.  What is going on here?

Dennis Murphy: You're getting married in shantytown, huh?

Barbara: Yeah. 

Dennis Murphy: Kiss the bride?

Barbara: Very stiffly.

There hadn't even been time to buy rings to slip on each other's fingers during the dismal, fluorescent-lit quickie service.  But Barbara tried to keep smiling through the ceremony and party afterwards. Later at their fancy hotel it got better, a gilded suite befitting a two-star admiral and his wife. The new Mrs. John Perry posed in a bride's white negligee.

But in the everyday reality of back home something was amiss, and it had to do with John's family, those talented and wealthy people he'd proudly described to Barbara: his astronaut son, his musician daughter, his sister, and most of all his reclusive grandmother, the matriarch and key to the Perry family fortune. 

Funny -- Barbara had always heard a lot about them - but never FROM them ....almost as if they were shunning her.  What kind of people would do that?  John's answer was like a slap.

Barbara: Because I was a gold digger.

Dennis Murphy: So what did you think about that?

Barbara: It hurt me that they wouldn't want to meet me.  Because i knew i was a nice person, and i wasn't a gold digger.

It didn't matter what they thought, John said, because neither of them would see the Perry millions any time soon because he was considered the black sheep of the family.  A black sheep, Barbara realized, who still spent like a wealthy heir.  There was their honeymoon trip to Hawaii, when they wandered into an art gallery featuring paintings by Barbara's childhood fave from TV, the comic Red Skelton.

Barbara: We get involved with one $75,000 painting and one--

Dennis Murphy: How much?

Barbara: Seventy-five thousand dollars and one--

Dennis Murphy: I thought you were having trouble makin' the mortgage notes?

Barbara: Right, but, john had this story where the company that he was now consulting with, that they could lease these paintings until he would get the money from his grandmother.

The art purchase came with an invitation to meet the famous entertainer himself -- and to this day the experience was one of the highlights of Barbara's life.  But it wasn't long before the proverbial honeymoon was over.  For one, there'd been the slight issue of John's arrest for theft the month before their move.

Barbara: He says, "Well, I have some bad news.  I was arrested today, and I owe $4,000 for these four Remington Rand typewriters.

John said it was all a big misunderstanding, and that he'd worked out a deal with the authorities:  the whole matter could be disposed of for $8-thousand dollars.  But where would they get money like that?  Why from Barbara's big house. They'd tack an additional loan onto the mortgage.  John would co-sign the papers, eventually becoming co-owner of the property. 

The house turned out to be perfect for entertaining friends and family. Pool parties, barbecues.  A photo album full of rich memories, and John at the center, a model husband:

John: The puppy hopes your birthday will be fun!

Playing ball with Barbara's nephew, pampering their beloved dogs, making dinner, giving romantic backrubs in the hot tub.

But even the happy times could no longer sugarcoat the harsh reality: John and Barbara were up to their eyeballs in debt, the piles of bills, taller than ever.  And the Perrys -- and their fortune -- were sounding more and more to Barbara like make-believe.

Barbara: There was always this kind of a consternation and dangling.  "Okay, we're gonna meet the family--"

Dennis Murphy: "We're gonna meet them tomorrow for dinner," or "they're coming over for coffee."  And it never happened, huh?

Barbara: No, never happened.

Barbara could only hold out hope that John's inheritance would one day come through.  But she had no doubt about one thing: John was his father's son, top military brass through and through.

Through the years Barbara and her friends had grown accustomed to the perks that came with John Perry's rank ... the special luncheons, private tours and roped-off areas that his Navy status allowed them access to.  Like during Fleet Week in San Francisco, when - thanks to John - their group was whisked to the exclusive VIP seating area.

Toni: How we got to sit there, I do not know.  (laughter) But, I have never seen so much navy brass in all my life.

Time and time again, Barbara had seen doors open for her husband, thanks to his military I.D.  A document that, in typical John Perry fashion, was shrouded in mystery. 

Barbara: It was not his picture.  And it was not his name.  But he would open that, and flash it, and we would have immediate entrance into any naval facility.

Dennis Murphy: What did he say when you said, "what's this thing?  That's not your photo, it's not your name."

Barbara: He said, "that's something that's very-- it's like a C.I.A. thing, you know.  And just don't ask about it but you saw it works."

Dennis Murphy: Secret world, but it works! It works!

John always had a plausible answer for everything which made Barbara feel foolish for even asking.  But now five years into their relationship, her trust in him was slowly eroding.  They were at the U.S. Naval Academy in Annapolis, to visit Admiral Perry's grave.  Yet John seemed to be having trouble finding his father's headstone.

Barbara: I'm thinking to myself, "Is this another time when I'm not gonna see the family?"  And eventually he said, "I think that's it." And sure enough, there's the grave of Rear Admiral Perry.  I thought to myself, "Well, at least I met somebody in the family, he just happens to be dead."

And a year later Barbara gratefully took it as more proof when John Perry told her he had a big surprise.

Barbara: He says, "Oh, oh!  There's something that came in the mail today that I want to show you." He goes out and he comes back in with this bag and he dumps out all these little boxes onto the couch. 

Teary-eyed, John opened up each box and showed Barbara his war medals: the Navy Cross, the Purple Heart.  The Distinguished Service Medal.  And finally ...

Barbara: The last one that he opened up was the congressional medal of honor.  Very impressive.

Barbara would soon learn that those medals were part of a dangerous and secret game John Perry was playing and wives weren't invited.

John Perry's medals, framed in a handsome case, now hung on the family room wall, among all the other Navy memorabilia he'd taken to collecting.  For weddings and special events, John would press his full Navy dress uniform, and bring another gleaming medal out of the case to pin to his chest. 

And there was no grander reason to don his Congressional Medal of Honor than the VIP event John sprung on Barbara seven years into their relationship -- an invitation to George Bush the '41's inauguration.

Barbara: We sat in the congressional medal of honor stands.  And everbody, including the president, stopped and saluted.

Dennis Murphy: Your husband?

Barbara: Right.

Dennis Murphy: The incoming President of the United States is saluting John Perry for service to the country?

Barbara: Uh-huh, right.

Later at one of the packed inaugural Balls, the crowds parted to let John - and his medal - pass.  Barbara in her expensive gown and diamonds never looked happier or more in love than she was that night on the arm of her decorated war hero.

But John's medals would also become a kind of early warning trip-wire alarm for events that would place Barbara in acute peril.  She calls it her “crazy year” -- and it began with a knock.

Barbara: The most unsettling was that the FBI showed up at my door one day and John wasn't there.

She told the agents looking for John to come back later.  Closing the door behind them, she went into the family room and noticed a blank space on the wall -- John's medals were gone!

Barbara: When John came in, I told him about the FBI.  And he said, "Oh, well, that just has to do with that case that i've been subpoenaed for a grand jury.  So, that's, you know, that's no big deal." And then I mentioned the medals, and he looked over.  And he said, "Oh--" he says, "Well, something happened to the frame.  And I took it down to the frame shop."

But the medals stayed missing, and not long after, John's consulting work mysteriously dried up.  And whenever Barbara voiced her concerns, John would blow up -- or sulk -- or threaten to leave.  So she willed herself to believe things were fine, and put up a positive front to her friends, who'd started wondering amongst themselves about John Perry.  All those stories of his. 

Toni: He said he was a jet pilot, and he was in the blue angels.  And then my husband said, "No way. Timeline's all wrong."

George:  He said he was best man at Frank Sinatra's wedding.  "Well, I don't think so." He says, "Well, this was a prior, you know, pre-wedding.  And I was the best man at that."

Geoff: He speaks five languages!  Spanish, French, German, I don't know, Italian, maybe, okay.  Then he comes to Swahili.  "John, speak Swahili."  Like I know what I'm gonna hear.  (laughter) He spoke something that could've been Swahili.

John's bizarre behavior -- his evasive maneuvering and outright stonewalling -- left Barbara feeling as if the ground were falling away beneath her feet.  More off-balance than ever, Barbara struggled to pin her husband down. 

Dennis Murphy: Barbara, many years into your marriage, you turned to your husband one day and asked a question not heard very often in these kinds of relationships.  You say, "John, who are you?"

Barbara: Right.

Dennis Murphy: Where did that come from?

Barbara: It came from inside, deep inside.  It was a buildup of all these strange things happening. I just sensed something wasn't right. 

John didn't answer, which made Barbara more suspicious -- and bolder about asking more tough questions.  John dodged each confrontation -- each time becoming more brooding, more secretive.  And now Barbara's building wariness couldn't keep pace with how swiftly her crazy year was moving into overdrive, how stealthily John Perry began maneuvering her into the path of danger. 

John: Luck is coming your way...

In April, John invited himself along on a business trip of Barbara's.  When she told him she had an early call the next morning, he insisted she take a pill to help her sleep. 

Barbara: I didn't really wanna do it.  But, you know, was like, "Okay, okay, just to make you happy, I'll take a sleeping pill."

Dennis Murphy: So, here take some of these, huh?

Barbara: Yeah, and so then he finds that he hasn't mailed the taxes.  Now, all of the sudden, we've got to go mail the taxes 'cause it's the 15th. I get the keys, I'm ready to drive.  He said, "Well, you can't drive because you've had the sleeping pill." Okay, yeah, so, put on my coat and off we go.  It was raining and he was going too fast.  And i said, "slow down, john, slow down!  There's a 90-degree turn coming up ahead.  You're not gonna make it."  And just as I said that, all of the sudden, the car veers off to the right and missed the telephone pole and we ended up out in a field with broken glass.

Dennis Murphy: The car is really banged up.

Barbara: Really banged up.

Dennis Murphy: And the next day, you went back and looked at the skid marks?

Barbara: Yeah, and that's when it really was obvious that I had missed meeting my maker by about an inch or two.

But Barbara hardly had time to recuperate from the car wreck, much less process what it was about.  In August, John told her that he'd secured a $15,000 loan on a Perry family property in Florida -- all they had to do was go down there to pick up the check.

Dennis Murphy: You never did get the money that trip, did you?

Barbara: No.  No.

That's because on the way to the bank, John slumped over and clutched his chest: heart attack. 

Dennis Murphy: I mean, scary?

Barbara: Oh, scary, scary.  I rushed him to Mercy hospital.  He was in intensive care for three days, and then in a regular room for another three or four days. 

Back in the Florida hotel room, Barbara made a disturbing discovery.

Barbara: When I looked in his briefcase, I found a bunch of pill cases that were pills that john hadn't taken normally.  I also found this object wrapped in aluminum foil.  And I opened it up, and it was a gun.

Dennis Murphy: A gun?

Barbara: A gun!

John assured her that the gun was for their protection in Miami.  Barbara felt she had to believe him -- the alternative was unthinkable -- but that voice of self-preservation inside her