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Britney Spears bounced for boorishness

Perhaps Britney Spears is taking her reputation as a total mess way too literally.
/ Source: msnbc.com news services

Perhaps Britney Spears is taking her reputation as a total mess way too literally.

The UK Sun reports that the melting pop tart got the boot from exclusive Los Angeles hotel the Chateau Marmont, for her increasingly odd behavior. One scene in particular involved an incident at the hotel’s restaurant in which Britney smeared her face with a plate of gourmet food. According to the Sun, disgusted guests demanded that the 25-year-old mother of two be removed from the premises now and forever.

“The diners were disgusted,” said a Sun source. “You wouldn’t expect that from a teenager in a fast-food joint.” The Spears spy added that, “Royalty have dined in this restaurant. Her behavior was totally unacceptable.”

Though it should be said, the Chateau Marmont isn’t famous for its classy clientele. This is the same hotel where John Belushi died of a drug overdose, Jim Morrison almost died falling from a window and Lindsay Lohan racked up an astronomical bill while living in a Marmont bungalow.

In keeping with past Marmont manners, Britney “constantly looked out-of-it when she came in, and the guests began to make noises,” the source told the Sun. What’s more, she recently failed to recognize fellow famous guest Victoria “Posh” Beckham. “The hotel acted before she made a huge scene," the source reports. “No one wants to be banned from staying at the Chateau.”

Apparently, inspiring such a blackball is the last thing Britney needs right now. “If she was trying to make a real go of her comeback, then the people who visit the Chateau are the ones who could make it happen," the source told the Sun.

Madonna preaches to the choir
Sure, Madonna came into this world pure Catholic, but now she’s calling herself “the ambassador of Judaism,” reports CourtTV’s Hollywood Heat.

The Kabbalah-touting pop icon took the trendy brand of Jewish mysticism to Israel, where she rang in the Hebrew New Year with Israeli president Shimon Peres. There, the two exchanged gifts. Madonna (or “Esther,” her chosen Hebrew name) received a super-fancy copy of the Old Testament.

Meanwhile, President Peres got a volume of “The Book of Splendor,” which is the guiding text of Kabbalah. According to Israeli newspaper Yediot Ahronot, Madonna inscribed “To Shimon Peres, the man I admire and love, Madonna.” 

“You don’t know how popular the Book of Splendor is among Hollywood actors,” Madonna reportedly told President Peres. “Everyone I meet talks to me only about that. I’m an ambassador for Judaism.”

Gee, maybe next year, he’ll get a copy of “The Secret” from Oprah.

Angelina Jolie: Done every drug, everWhile she still has a couple of years before she has to explain it to the kids, Angelina Jolie is upfront to everyone else about her copious experience with “The Dope,” reports the UK Mirror.  Yet despite her many pre-motherhood experimentations, marijuana is the one thing she can’t handle.

“I’ve done coke, heroin, ecstasy, LSD, everything,” said the 32-year-old movie star mom.

According to the Mirror, Angelina even combined an LSD trip with a trip to Disneyland. “’I started thinking about Mickey Mouse being a short, middle-aged man in a costume who hates life," she told the paper. “Those drugs can be dangerous if you don’t go into it positively — I gave them up long ago.” 

Yet despite her fear and loathing in the Magic Kingdom, Angelina said the one drug she hated most of all was cannabis because, according to the Mirror, it made her giggle too much.

Dish on the flyIt was the Princess and the Pee, reports TMZ, when Paris Hilton stepped in a puddle of sewer water after exciting an exclusive nightclub. When an onlooker announced that the puddle might very well be urine, a perturbed Paris made a misguided announcement regarding communicable diseases. “Oh my God, I have, like, AIDS,” she exclaimed. Gee, maybe she should have stuck out high school a little longer, if only for a semester of sex ed. . . .  On TV, they play uncle and niece, but TMZ reports that “Heroes” Hayden Panettiere and Milo Ventimiglia seemed as close as kissin’ cousins at an Emmys after party. When asked if the two were an item, Hayden snapped, “I’m holding onto him because I’m about to fall over in these heels!”

Tabloid Tidbits is compiled by Ree Hines & Helen A.S. Popkin