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Let's revisit 'The Breakfast Club' library before seeing President Bush's

April 25, 2013 at 2:01 PM ET

Universal Pictures /
The stars of classic teen angst tale "The Breakfast Club," from left, Ally Sheedy, Judd Nelson, Anthony Michael Hall, Emilio Estevez and Molly Ringwald.

If the newly dedicated George W. Bush Presidential Library and Museum isn't on your list of must-see sites this summer, let us offer another way to spend some time in a library. Go watch "The Breakfast Club" again.

Instead of Dallas, you'll be in Shermer, Ill., for the 1985 film about five high school troublemakers spending a Saturday in detention. And while ex-President Bush was certainly known for any number of one-liners over the course of his eight years in office, we're more suited to looking back on our favorites from the brain, the beauty, the jock, the rebel, and the recluse.

Here's three (clean ones) from each of the five stars:

Brian Johnson/the brain (Anthony Michael Hall)

  • "She lives in Canada. I met her at Niagara Falls. You wouldn't know her." -- to Bender, on his sexual conquest
  • "When you pull the trunk, the light was supposed to come on and mine ... well ... didn't turn on." -- on his failed lamp project
  • "Chicks cannot hold their smoke. That's what it is." -- to Bender, while smoking pot

Claire Standish/the beauty (Molly Ringwald)

  • "Do you know how popular I am? I am so popular. Everybody loves me so much at this school." -- to the group
  • "I have a really low tolerance for dehydration." -- to Mr. Vernon
  • "You know, you look a lot better without all that black s--- under your eyes." -- to Allison, while doing her makeup

Andrew Clark/the jock (Emilio Estevez)

  • "Just you and me. Two hits. Me hitting you. You hitting the floor. Anytime you're ready, pal." -- to Bender
  • "I can, uh, tape all your buns together." -- to the group, on his talent
  • "We're all pretty bizarre. Some of us are just better at hiding it, that's all." -- to the group

John Bender/the rebel (Judd Nelson)

  • "I got a question. Does Barry Manilow know that you raid his wardrobe?" -- to Mr. Vernon
  • "You know what I got for Christmas? Oh, it was a banner f---ing year at the old Bender family. I got a carton of cigarettes. The old man grabbed me and said, 'Hey, smoke up Johnny.'" -- to Claire
  • "I wanna be just like you. I figure all I need, is a lobotomy and some tights." -- to the wrestler, Andrew

Allison Reynolds/the recluse (Ally Sheedy)

  • "Well, if you say you haven't, you're a prude. If you say you have you're a slut. It's a trap. You want to but you can't, and when you do you wish you didn't, right?" -- to Claire
  • "I'll do anything sexual, and I don't need a million dollars to do it either. I'm a nymphomaniac." -- to Andrew
  • "Yeah. I always carry this much s--- in my bag. You never know when you may have to jam." -- to Brian and Andrew

Bonus!

Richard Vernon/detention monitor (Paul Gleason)

  • "It is now 7:06. You have exactly 8 hours and 54 minutes to think about WHY you are here -- to ponder the error of your ways." -- to group at start of detention
  • "Don't mess with the bull young man, you'll get the horns." -- to Bender
  • "You're not fooling anyone, Bender. The next screw that falls out will be you." -- to Bender, over library door fiasco

Here's to hoping no screws just fall out of any doors at the Bush Library (it happens all the time, the world's an imperfect place).

If you're a fan of "The Breakfast Club," share your favorite scenes and lines over on our Facebook page.

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