Today's Fresh Blogs...

• ZE BIG TWELEVEN DETESTS YOUR FEEBLE MATH

  Published: July 26, 2007, 3:21 pm

  Tags: Media Whoring, Excellence Is The Product Of Managerial Synergies Flowi, Blog Buddies, Big 10 Conference, Coaches The Bcs Scandals Arrests And Other Eccentri, College Football, Southeastern Conference

  off as an eleven team conference to being drastically misnamed as a 12 name conferences. We now suggest the following replacements for the name “Big Ten” for no fee whatsoever: –The Increasingly Inaccurately Named Big Ten by Douglas Adams. –Off Tackle Right: The Conference –The Big 12. Fuck ‘em. Let

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• DAY 2 AT THE LIARS' CLUB: SEC MEDIA DAYS SCHEDULE

  Published: July 26, 2007, 11:59 am

  Tags: I Don T Have Time For This Shit, Media Whoring, Blog Buddies, College Football, Southeastern Conference

  SEC Media Days, the rootin’-est, tootin’-est, shootin’-est conflagration of 400 pound sportswriters and the coaches who loathe them in the nation. The updates from the boots on the ground: Chris Vernon says…”elastic waistbands are in at media days, in fact, I feel weird that I have a belt on. A conservative estimate

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• SEC MEDIA DAYS: HIGHLIGHTS

  Published: July 25, 2007, 5:24 pm

  Tags: Media Whoring, Click Clack, Blog Buddies, College Football, Coaches The Bcs Scandals Arrests And Other Eccentri, Atlantic Coast Conference, Southeastern Conference

  your cat on the way into the conference. We’ll have quotes to follow, especially from Tuberville, who as the poor man’s Spurrier should have some slightly less witty comments with slightly duller zingers built in for conference rivals.

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• SABAN COLLECTS SECONDARY VIOLATIONS, GREY SUITS

  Published: July 25, 2007, 11:43 am

  Tags: Recruiting, Alabama Man He Can Drink He Can Bowl He Can Drink Some, Blog Buddies, College Football, Coaches The Bcs Scandals Arrests And Other Eccentri, Southeastern Conference

  Nick Saban’s been collecting secondary recruiting violations, according to Ray Melick on Al.com quoting “an official with knowledge of the infractions process.” This kind of leakage regarding secondary violations is common enough on message boards. They’re the kind of tales usually involving second-root contact with

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• DAILY AFFIRMATION: DAY 38

  Published: July 25, 2007, 8:14 am

  Tags: Conan Thinks Your Tailgate Is Weak, Blog Buddies, College Football, Coaches The Bcs Scandals Arrests And Other Eccentri, Southeastern Conference

  Our daily affirmation salutes the adventurous soul of our rivals’ qb, the Baby Sex Cannon, the one and only Matt Stafford…known to some as the cuddly “Big Spoon.” (See here in case you are one of the three people who don’t know where that pic came from, ‘k thx?)

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• SEC MEDIA DAYS: THAT NOISE IS ED ORGERON

  Published: July 27, 2007, 12:07 pm

  Tags: The Orgeron, Lemsday, Blog Buddies, College Football, Coaches The Bcs Scandals Arrests And Other Eccentri, Southeastern Conference

  That noise you hear is Ed Orgeron speaking at SEC Media days, where he’s just finished up a booming and “optimistic” rundown of the Ole Miss Rebels, all the while winning the Al.com pool for “most likely to fry our audio equipment.” Mock at your own risk. The Orgeron has endured tougher battles. The Orgeron,

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• THE CURIOUS INDEX, 7/31/07

  Published: July 30, 2007, 11:21 am

  Tags: Video Game Stabbin, Blog Buddies, Bizarro Superman Says You Re Welcome, All Conference, Bloviating, All Name Team, Big 10 Conference, College Football, Coaches The Bcs Scandals Arrests And Other Eccentri, Southeastern Conference, Big 12 Conference, Pacific 10 Confer

  records and then tanking in-conference games. Most intriguingly: Nebraska, a tremendously balanced team getting less than their share of publicity despite having Sam Keller coming into the starting lineup. USC/Nebraska will have to be on the ol’ wristwatch television during the UT/UF hatefest on September 15th. 9. We’ve said it

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• FLORIDA TO MOVE TO BIG TEN! NEW COACH: SASQUATCH!

  Published: July 31, 2007, 11:15 am

  Tags: Blog Buddies, Sprained Cerebrum, Big 10 Conference, College Football, Coaches The Bcs Scandals Arrests And Other Eccentri, Southeastern Conference

  Florida to the Big Ten! Sasquatch! This is…this is just fucktarded. Just Darwin award dumb. Like, Oscar Davenport Wonderlic dumb. The kind of dumb that you’re afraid to even shake hands with, lest it prove contagious. From David Jones at PennLive. And former Big 12 commissioner Kevin Weiberg’s recent move to the Big Ten

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• NYAN BOATENG, SENSITIVE LOVER

  Published: August 1, 2007, 10:43 am

  Tags: Stabbing=passion, Fulmer Cup, Back Like Cooked Crack, Blog Buddies, College Football, Coaches The Bcs Scandals Arrests Other Eccentri, Pacific 10 Conference, Southeastern Conference

  Mr Stabby feels love, too. Nyan Boateng was a VHT who flamed out of the Florida program after accomplishing the following things: 1. Causing reporters to guffaw when he claimed he ran a 4.1 40 yard dash. 2. Not outplaying Kenneth Tookes for the fifth spot on the Gators ‘05 roster. 3. Getting stabbed in the leg by his girlfriend during a

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• EDSBS TOP 25: GETTING ON WITH IT FROM 13-25.

  Published: August 6, 2007, 12:18 pm

  Tags: Big 10 Conference, Mid Major Conferences, Blogpollin, All Conference, College Football, Atlantic Coast Conference, Coaches The Bcs Scandals Arrests Other Eccentri, Big 12 Conference, Pacific 10 Conference, Southeastern Conference

  We’ve never taken this long to put together a top 25. But frankly, we’ve never had this much data. Watch as we take information well past the point of diminishing returns and put together rankings that, in all likelihood, are just as accurate as the one put together by a chicken peckiing at random bits of corn on the ground.

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• PERHAPS YOU'D LIKE TO SPEAK WITH COACH FULMER

  Published: August 6, 2007, 2:33 pm

  Tags: Phil Fulmer Very, Very Fat, Blog Buddies, College Football, Coaches The Bcs Scandals Arrests Other Eccentri, Southeastern Conference

  Damn right I want four Tequizas. Now. In looking for signs that Phil Fulmer is guaranteed job security for life, we lean on Mark Bradley suggesting that he’s going to be fired in the first week of December. A sportswriter going on the record with that kind of certainty is like having the CIA pronounce a country as “stable” and

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• SPURRIER IS TEMPERAMENTAL, PT. 1283512

  Published: August 6, 2007, 4:42 pm

  Tags: Click Clack, Recruiting, College Football, Coaches The Bcs Scandals Arrests Other Eccentri, Southeastern Conference

  Steve Spurrier has threatened everything short of taking back that beautiful shiny ring he bought you for the anniversary if you don’t let his recruits into school. Spurrier’s enraged over South Carolina rejecting two of his recruits who met NCAA standards but didn’t pass SC’s internal requirements. (Clemson grads and

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• BLOGTOBERFEST! OWEN SCHMITT MOHAWK EDITION.

  Published: August 7, 2007, 12:03 pm

  Tags: Big 10 Conference, Mid Major Conferences, Notre Dame, West Fucking Virginia, College Football, Atlantic Coast Conference, Coaches The Bcs Scandals Arrests Other Eccentri, Big 12 Conference, Big East Conference, Pacific 10 Conference, Southeastern Conference

  college football discussion, conference comparisons.

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• LAMARCUS COKER SUSPENDED FROM VOLS. NOT AS FUNNY AS IT COULD BE

  Published: August 8, 2007, 7:16 am

  Tags: Very Fat, Weed, Phil Fulmer Very, Blog Buddies, Coaches The Bcs Scandals Arrests Other Eccentri, College Football, Southeastern Conference

  Lamarcus Coker, Tennessee Vols starting tailback and alleged savior of the Tennessee run game, will only be running stadium stairs for the immediate future as he has been suspended indefinitely by Phil Fulmer for violating the team substance abuse policy. Yes, go ahead and play this during the rest of the piece. We’re Florida fans. We know

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• DRUNK LADIES! COCKTAILS FOR YOUR TEAM, 2007.

  Published: August 8, 2007, 9:03 am

  Tags: Blog Buddies, Drankin, Wannstache, Big 10 Conference, College Football, Coaches The Bcs Scandals Arrests Other Eccentri, Big East Conference, Pacific 10 Conference, Southeastern Conference

  We occasionally like to bring a feminine touch to the site, and not just by wearing the customary orange and blue panties and garter belt we blog in day in and day out. (Your breakfast just wound up on the keyboard. Again: we didn’t ask for these powers!) The ladies from the appropriately named Ladies… took our challenge of stating

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