Today's Fresh Blogs...

• ZE BIG TWELEVEN DETESTS YOUR FEEBLE MATH

  Published: July 26, 2007, 3:21 pm

  Tags: Media Whoring, Excellence Is The Product Of Managerial Synergies Flowi, Blog Buddies, Big 10 Conference, Coaches The Bcs Scandals Arrests And Other Eccentri, College Football, Southeastern Conference

  With that change, the Big Ten goes from being slightly off as an eleven team conference to being drastically misnamed as a 12 name conferences. We now suggest the following replacements for the name “Big Ten” for no fee whatsoever: –The Increasingly Inaccurately Named Big Ten by Douglas Adams. –Off Tackle Right:

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• DAILY AFFIRMATION: DAY [REDACTED]

  Published: July 26, 2007, 9:25 am

  Tags: Name Redacted, Hope, Pain Pain Pain, Push It To The Limit, Big 10 Conference, College Football

  College football’s a game of unbridled joy, but it’s also one of “harm-joy.” Castaway, you’ll find what you’re looking for in that department, too, in just 37 short days.

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• THE CURIOUS INDEX, 7/31/07

  Published: July 30, 2007, 11:21 am

  Tags: Video Game Stabbin, Blog Buddies, Bizarro Superman Says You Re Welcome, All Conference, Bloviating, All Name Team, Big 10 Conference, College Football, Coaches The Bcs Scandals Arrests And Other Eccentri, Southeastern Conference, Big 12 Conference, Pacific 10 Confer

  records and then tanking in-conference games. Most intriguingly: Nebraska, a tremendously balanced team getting less than their share of publicity despite having Sam Keller coming into the starting lineup. USC/Nebraska will have to be on the ol’ wristwatch television during the UT/UF hatefest on September 15th. 9. We’ve said it

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• DAILY AFFIRMATION: DAY 32

  Published: July 31, 2007, 9:24 am

  Tags: Hope, Big 10 Conference, College Football, Coaches The Bcs Scandals Arrests And Other Eccentri

  For today, we remind you that carrying a farting, 30 pound piece of metal around a field while wearing a dorky wool/poly blend uniform does have its benefits.

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• FLORIDA TO MOVE TO BIG TEN! NEW COACH: SASQUATCH!

  Published: July 31, 2007, 11:15 am

  Tags: Blog Buddies, Sprained Cerebrum, Big 10 Conference, College Football, Coaches The Bcs Scandals Arrests And Other Eccentri, Southeastern Conference

  at PennLive. And former Big 12 commissioner Kevin Weiberg’s recent move to the Big Ten Network only adds to the intrigue. He knows about Texas’ TV clout better than anyone. Texas in the Big 10! It’s a done deal! How this happened earlier we’ll never know, with only geography, history, demographics, and other

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• EDSBS TOP 25: GETTING ON WITH IT FROM 13-25.

  Published: August 6, 2007, 12:18 pm

  Tags: Big 10 Conference, Mid Major Conferences, Blogpollin, All Conference, College Football, Atlantic Coast Conference, Coaches The Bcs Scandals Arrests Other Eccentri, Big 12 Conference, Pacific 10 Conference, Southeastern Conference

  13. Nebraska. The Big 12 North–also known as the lucky winner of one massive ass-whipping from either Texas or Oklahoma, redeemable at the Big 12 Championship game–will likely be won by the wonderfully balanced team from Nebraska. Bill Callahan’s mystical offense is sometimes talked about in hushed tones and only

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• BLOGTOBERFEST! OWEN SCHMITT MOHAWK EDITION.

  Published: August 7, 2007, 12:03 pm

  Tags: Big 10 Conference, Mid Major Conferences, Notre Dame, West Fucking Virginia, College Football, Atlantic Coast Conference, Coaches The Bcs Scandals Arrests Other Eccentri, Big 12 Conference, Big East Conference, Pacific 10 Conference, Southeastern Conference

  proctology exams in the Pac-10. Rankin also plans on punching a hole through the Olympia Mountains just to give the people on the other side some fresh air. Boise State is reloading in grand fashion at running back, according to The Idaho Statesman. Owen Schmitt, EDSBS man crush and superhuman fullback for the West Virginia Mountaineers, has a

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• DRUNK LADIES! COCKTAILS FOR YOUR TEAM, 2007.

  Published: August 8, 2007, 9:03 am

  Tags: Blog Buddies, Drankin, Wannstache, Big 10 Conference, College Football, Coaches The Bcs Scandals Arrests Other Eccentri, Big East Conference, Pacific 10 Conference, Southeastern Conference

  We occasionally like to bring a feminine touch to the site, and not just by wearing the customary orange and blue panties and garter belt we blog in day in and day out. (Your breakfast just wound up on the keyboard. Again: we didn’t ask for these powers!) The ladies from the appropriately named Ladies… took our challenge of stating

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• THE BRIDGES OF CHAMPAIGN COUNTY

  Published: August 9, 2007, 5:25 pm

  Tags: Name Redacted, Keep It Gay, Big 10 Conference, College Football

  I know it’s late, I know you’re weary. We were trying to layoff after we let whatever dark demon lives under the stairs of our brain write the Galactus/Tom Brady Who’s Now piece. But dammit, Tom Dienhart’s lead-in to this story on [NAME REDACTED]’s expectations for 2007 is too damn suggestive not to post. CHAMPAIGN,

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• DAILY AFFIRMATION: DAY 19

  Published: August 13, 2007, 5:42 am

  Tags: Hope, Big 10 Conference, College Football

  Today’s Daily Affirmation brought to you by Curmudgeon Motors of Ann Arbor. When you’re tired of all that bullshit, come to Curmudgeon Motors. I’m Lloyd Carr, and I don’t give a rat’s ass whether you buy a car. God, I hate this shit. Where’s my windbreaker? Jesus…these people…

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• CURIOUS INDEX, 8/13/07

  Published: August 13, 2007, 9:45 am

  Tags: Notre Dame, Blog Buddies, All Conference, Wannstache, Big 10 Conference, College Football, Coaches The Bcs Scandals Arrests Other Eccentri, Big East Conference, Pacific 10 Conference, Atlantic Coast Conference, Southeastern Conference

  hovers somewhere around the $1000 mark per ticket. 9. Currently reading: This morning? Michael Statsny’s take on Black Swan. Because we love to read things we don’t really understand in the least, especially when it relates to something we don’t really have: money. 10.We watched Tim Brando, Spencer Tillman, and Terry Bowden do

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• HYPERACTIVE MIDGETS LUV MICHIGAN STATE

  Published: August 14, 2007, 1:18 pm

  Tags: Starters Place At The Table, Blog Buddies, Big 10 Conference, College Football, Coaches The Bcs Scandals Arrests Other Eccentri

  side linebacker in the Big Televen and running through tight end blocks if he’s lucky, and defensive ends and worse if he’s not. When you’re weird by weight already, you’re a special variant of strange. Jon Misch is sorry he killed your brother. Misch deepens the strange, however, with the bio: he’s got a 137

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• JOSEPH PATERNO ARRESTED FOR COKE

  Published: August 16, 2007, 3:00 am

  Tags: Wrong Doesn T Describe Our Wrongness, I Do Cocaine, Brains, Paterno, Blog Buddies, College Football, Big 10 Conference, Coaches The Bcs Scandals Arrests Other Eccentri

  and it wouldn’t be bigger than Joe Paterno getting arrested for this. We mean…this is it. This is huge. This is the story that flips the enormous turtle the world rests on upside down, thus flipping the whole universe into disarray. Just…just hold yourself while you read this. Say it ain’t so, Joe! Joseph Paterno,

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• FULMER CUPDATE: PENN STATE PULLS AHEAD

  Published: August 17, 2007, 10:05 am

  Tags: Fulmer Cup, Big 10 Conference, College Football, Coaches The Bcs Scandals Arrests Other Eccentri

  Yes, there’s Michigan players finally being charged for “stomping on the victim’s head while wearing heavy boots during the fray,” a case which earns Michigan five more points to put them at a respectable 15 points total for the campaign for the Fulmer Cup. (Breakdown: Felony assault=3, two cases of misdemeanor assault, one

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• DAILY AFFIRMATION: DAY 15

  Published: August 17, 2007, 11:00 am

  Tags: Hope, Big 10 Conference, College Football

  Somewhere, his unblinking head sits in a closet. Never sleeping. Always staring. Waiting. (Courtesy of Brian @ House Rock Built)

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